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Monthly Archive

July 2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 2116 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2535

Ethical Question

"Would it be ethical to dig up the remains of of the USA founding fathers, create clones from the bone cells, and place them in a theme park called Clonial Williamsburg?" read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1851

Everything

Q. What do you give a man who has everything?A. Antibiotics.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2243

Excavating Burial Ground

Two women archeologists are down in Mexico excavating an ancient Mayan burial ground looking for some remains to take back to their museum. Unfortunately, everything they run across is badly decompose... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1744

Family Furniture

Working on a new trick, a magician turned his wife into a couch and his kids into chairs, but he couldn't turn them back.What have I done? he wondered. How can I bring back my family?Out of ideas, he ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4018

Fan Pun

While I was in the Air Force in Vietnam, I was in charge of a parts supply depot where the only relief from the heat was provided by an electric fan in my office.One morning I accidentally caught my f... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2117

Farmer Loses 2025 Pigs

Howard County police officers still write their reports by hand. The data is entered later into their database by a clerk.One theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6636

Fate Pun

"Oh, master...tell me of fate.""Ah, my son...it is what has brought great nations together. It has made the world a smaller place in which to live. It has inspired men of worth to work endless hours. read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2111

Feeding

"Mom," said the little girl, "Is it alright to say you are going to water the horse when you are giving him a drink of water?""Yes," said her mother, "that is the correct thing to say.""Well then, I'm read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1977

Fight

A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2586

Fine Furniture

As the woman was instructing the new maid on the great care required in handling certain valuable household objects. She pointed to the dining room and said with great satisfaction, "That table goes b... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3644

Firefly

A mother firefly and her brood were out for a walk. 'Whatever happens,' mom ordered, 'don't shine your light. I don't want you eaten by owls.'Sure enough, after a little while, she spotted the younges... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4778

Firewood Pun

There was this nun named Sister Mary who, though she tried and tried, could never please the Mother Superior. One day she comes up with an idea: since the abbey was always cold, she decided to cut som... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1651

Fish Pun

Q. What does a fish with out an eye look like?A. Fsh... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2035

Fish Tank

Two fish are in a tank.One says to the other, "I'll man the guns, you drive."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1598

Fisherman Books

WATERWAYS OF THE WORLD by Sue S. CanalA FISH STORY by Czar DeanCAUGHT IN THE FLOOD by Noah ZarkLITTLE FISHES by Anne Chovey... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2321

Fishing Pun 1

Jim had an awful day fishing, sitting on the lake all day without a single bite. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four catfish. He told the fish salesman, "Pick out the four... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1856

Fishing Pun 2

Ernie had an awful day fishing, sitting on the lake all day without a single bite. On his way home, he stopped at the supermarket and ordered four walleye. He told the fish salesman, "Pick out the fou... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1823

Flat Cat

Mr. Frobisher walked anxiously to the house and knocked. When a nice old lady answered, he said very sad, “I’m sorry, madam, but I have some bad news. “I’m afraid I have run over your cat. I… I would ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6428

Flea

Pet Store: "Buy one, get one flea."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2028

Flies

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1975

Floor Boards

Did you hear about the Broadway actor who broke through the floor boards?He was just going through a stage.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2318

Florist Problem

Some monks were running low on funds, but didn't want to close up their monastery. After much consideration, they decided to start selling the flowers they grew. Soon after opening up shop, business b... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1665

Flu Differences

What's the difference between Bird 'Flu and Swine 'Flu?For one you need Tweetment and for the other Oinkment.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3525

Flying Pun

What's the purpose of the airplane propeller? To keep the pilot cool.-If you don't think so, just let it stop and watch him sweat!... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2417

Folk Song Pun

My Uncle Jim did not appear to be much for words. Nor, was he ever seen to have friends or pets. We thought he was the primordial loner, until one time we caught him with his ant farm.He loved the c... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1778

Food Pun 1

The sandwich dates back to the time man discovered he could not live by bread alone.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4246

Food Pun 2

Q: How can you use a lighthouse, rose trellis, windstorm, dune, and Halloween costume to create something tasty? A: Make a beacon, lattice, and tornado sand witch.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1583

Free or Not Free

The Fourth of July was coming up, and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. "We live in a great country," she said. "One of the things we should be happy ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2954

Freedom

Memorial Day weekend was coming up, and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. "We live in a great country," she said. "One of the things we should be hap... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
13761

Frisbee Pun

The other day I was standing in the park wondering why Frisbees get bigger and bigger the closer they get.Then it hit me.... read more..

Results 241 - 270 of 2116