Monthly Archive

July 2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 1936 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1556

Physical Question

After getting a physical from my doctor, I asked, "Well Doc, how do I stand?"The doctor said, "That's what puzzles me."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2176

Pi Pun

I dated a girl in high school who was sweet as pi, but she sure was irrational.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1639

Pick Up Line Pun

A man approaches a beautiful woman, and says, "Want a little company?" And the woman says, "Why? Do you have one to sell?"... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2713

Picking a New Pope

There were two Catholic boys, Timothy Murphy and Antonio Secola, whose lives parallel each other in amazing ways. In the same year Timothy was born in Ireland, Antonio was born in Italy.Faithfully the... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1948

Pie Pun 1

Mathematicians are all wrong! They're always talking about "Pi R squared." No! No! No!... Pie R round, it's cornbread that R squared!... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1866

Pie Pun 2

I did my nurse's training at a hospital in Liverpool, England. My fellow students and I had little money for meals, so we ate the awful food provided at the hospital complex. We often took our break... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4640

Pig Name

A farmer brought his daughter a pet pig, which she called "Stinky" when it was in her room but she called it "Ballpoint" when it was in the sty."Tell me," he asked her father, "Why do you have two nam... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3352

Pig Tail Pun

Why is five o'clock in the morning like a pig's tail?It's twirly.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
10284

Pillow Pun

Corduroy pillows are making headlines.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
13308

Pineapple

"I can't believe I ate that whole pineapple!" Bill said, dolefully. read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
3269

Pink Elephant

A pink elephant is a beast of bourbon.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
13635

Pisa Pun

The Italian government is considering installing a clock in the Leaning Tower of Pisa. The reason? What good is it to have the inclination if you don't have the time?... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1868

Plumber's Sign

Seen on a plumber's truck:"We repair what your husband fixed. - Don't sleep with a drip."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2134

Podiatrist's Sign

In a Podiatrist's office:"Time wounds all heels."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1623

Poet

A backward poet writes inverse.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1887

Poet Pun

Tony Blair is visiting an Edinburgh hospital. He enters a ward full of patients with no obvious sign of injury or illness. He greets the first patient and the patient replies, "Fair fa your honest s... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1985

Poetry Pun

An English professor was reading Canterbury Tales to his class and noticed that one of his students had fallen asleep. The professor was annoyed enough to send the book spinning through the air and b... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2329

Political Pun

A Congressman is awakened in the middle of the night by his wife who whispers, "I think there's a thief in the house.""Not in the House," her husband says. "Perhaps in the Senate, my dear, but not in... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4084

Poll Pun

I took a part time job as an opinion poll sampler. On my very first call, I introduced myself, "Hello, this is a telephone poll."The man replied, "Hello. This is a street lamp."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2365

Pollster Pun

A political pollster knocked on the door and a sour-faced lady answered."What party does your husband belong to?" he asked.The lady responded curtly, "I sir, am the party he belongs to."... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2239

Pope Pun 1

Selecting a new Pope, a couple of Popes back, a gentleman from Spain was given weighty consideration. His name was Cardinal Sicola. However the College of Cardinals decided against him in the end. ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4496

Poppins Pun

Mary Poppins decides to grow some vegetables one year. When she picks her crop in the Autumn, her carrots, potatoes, onions and spring beans have all failed, but her cauliflowers have grown a treat.S... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1639

Potato Problem

One evening, I went with my parents to a fancy restaurant. Dad was about halfway through his meal when he took a hard look at the potato, called the waitress over and said, "This potato is bad!" The w... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1566

Pottie Pun

In order to move Porto-Potties, will you need a John Derek?... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
4508

Prayer Pun

A young woman went to her priest and asked him if it was all right for her to pray while she knit. The priest seeing a good opportunity to advance the theory of praying without ceasing replied that, ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2235

Preacher Barber

There was once a small rural community, so small, in fact, the only church in town is a small Baptist church whose pastor must also double up as the local barber to make ends meet.There happened to be... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
6144

Presentation Pun

Preparing for the most important presentation of his life, a sales rep went to a psychiatrist. "I'll implant a hypnotic suggestion in your mind," said the shrink. "Just say 'one-two-three,' and you'... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1776

Priest Hole

A priest rushed from church one day to keep a golf date. He was halfway down the first fairway, waiting to hit his second shot, when he heard the familiar "FORE!" and a ball slammed into his back.Soon... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
9035

Priest Pun

When a priest makes a mistake in church, it's a clerical error.... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2446

Prison

Jimmy was sent to prison for his crimes but he told the warden he wasn't worried at all about serving his full term.The warden asked him why, since most prisoners immediately start planning how they c... read more..