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Monthly Archive

February 2016

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 54 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
698

Cybersalt News - February 18, 2016

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! I haven't mentioned this here yet, but my church has graciously and sacrificially given me a 6 month sabbatical, which began yesterday. The day started out very early with ... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1303

One-liner #0993

I misplaced my thesaurus and feel terrible; just terrible, really terrible.... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1315

Quote #1442

"Christians should not be optimists; we know too much about sin. We should also not be pessimists, for we know the living God." - Timothy Keller read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4564

Brain vs Brawn

The strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could out do anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes,... read more..

Funny Pictures
Pastor Tim
2764

Remove Child

Just in case some people go too far trying to save water! ... read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1267

Quote #1441

"God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart form Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing." - C.S. Lewis read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3790

Accents

About a year ago my sister, who lives in Virginia, was talking with her four year old son, Brent. He was asking her why all their relatives from Wisconsin talk funny and sound like their noses are pl... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2685

Contractor

My job is in the Aerospace Industry, and it's always been a challenge to explain what kind of work I do. At one gathering, I tried several unsuccessful attempted explanations before deciding to be a read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1531

Inspiration

A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon. "How do you know what to say?" he asked. "Why, God tells me." "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"   read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
979

One-liner #0992

I didn’t sleep well last night so I made my coffee this morning with Red Bull instead of water.  I was half way to work when I realized I forgot my car. read more..

Sermons
Pastor Tim
1134

Hate Your Enemies: You have heard that it was said

Jesus clarifies what God's desire is for our hearts in regard to our enemies. Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20160214.mp3{/audio} read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1126

One-liner #0991

My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his head.   read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
1615

Quote #1440

"If you do not believe in regeneration, if you do not see its utter absolute necessity, then I do not see that you have any right to regard yourself as a Christian. If you do not see that you are so read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
789

Cybersalt News - February 15, 2016

There is a new Funny Cat Picture on Cybersalt site today. You will find "Cat Antlers" at:www.cybersalt.org/funny-cat-pictures/cat-antlers  Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
737

Cybersalt News - February 16, 2016

There is a new Funny Picture on Cybersalt site today. You will find "Remove Child" at:www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/remove-child  Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.... read more..

Funny Cat Pictures
Pastor Tim
8535

Cat Antlers

This magical pillow shows what pets really think of themselves. ... read more..

Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
2705

Teacher's Gifts

On a special teacher's day, a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it over her head, and said, "I bet I know what it is - f... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1964

Encyclopedia Surprise

Working as a computer instructor for an adult-education program at a community college, I am keenly aware of the gap in computer knowledge between my younger and older students. My observations were ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3445

Bilingual Parrot

This guy goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. He sees one on a perch with a red string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to it's right leg. He asks the owner the significance of the string... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
2106

Roadside Puppies

A dog who gave birth to puppies on the roadside was cited for littering. read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3374

Guard Dog

My sister-in-law, a truck driver, decided to get a dog for protection. As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, "He doesn't like men." "Perfect," my sister-in-law thought and took ... read more..

Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
4039

Farmer Comeback

A wise old farmer went to town to buy a pickup truck that he saw advertised in the paper for a certain price. After telling the salesman which truck he wanted, they sat down to do the paperwork. When ... read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
720

Cybersalt News - February 13, 2016

If you do not like puns do not go to Cybersalt's Valentine Pun page at:www.cybersalt.org/clean-puns/valentine-puns If you do like to read flame e-mails I am sent because some people can't take a joke... read more..

Hall of Flames
Pastor Tim
1931

Not "Foxy" Enough

When one PearyGates List subscriber unsubscribed in response to the "Hat Headline" joke I shared (which stars President Obama, The Pope, and Fox News - www.cybersalt.org/pearly-gates-jokes/hat-he... read more..

Illustrations
Pastor Tim
1678

Rest, Busyness

Helen and Amanda were discussing their busy schedules. Helen said, "Amanda, I must ask you something. Every day I feel incredibly run down and tired. And yet, I see you looking as fresh as a rose. I ... read more..

Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1485

Doughboy

The Pillsbury Doughboy is my my roll model.... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3096

Age

When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. When you are older, you will settle for being the master of your weight and the captain of your bowl... read more..

One-liners
Pastor Tim
1011

One-liner #0990

"I've gotten to the age where I need my false teeth and hearing aid before I can ask where I left my glasses." read more..

Quotes
Pastor Tim
2065

Quote #1439

“People do not drift toward holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compro read more..

Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
747

Cybersalt News - February 12, 2016

It's a few days late for the best timing of this Cybersalt classic funny sign picture (which I actually took of a friend's church in 2009). Just the same, the idea of shoving pancakes has as fun ... read more..

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