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Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings, everyone!
The big news at Cybersalt World Headquarters is the "no news yet" as Grandma Cybersalt and I await news of the arrival of our 6th grandchild - due 3 days ago! We know it is a granddaughter, we know her name is Abigail, and I am guessing she will be like me because she is late!
It's getting late as I prepare this and I don't have a video lined up to share today, so for now . . . .
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
~ Pastor Tim
Toilet Brush
My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.
Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush.
He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too, 'cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago."
One-Liner #1761
U-Haul has the worst drivers of any company!
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
Careful When Drinking
To stay out of hot water when brewing a pun it's best to use subtle tea.
Quote #2196
"Children are not a distraction from more important work; they are the most important work."
- C. S. Lewis
Discipline, Serving
When our son Jimmy went to Navy boot camp, we waited impatiently for word from him.
Finally we received a post card telling us he was doing well and we shouldn't worry. It went on to say that he was being kept busy acclimating to a military lifestyle and that he would send a detailed letter in a couple of weeks.
After reading his card a second time, however, we noticed that Jimmy had faintly underlined letters throughout the note.
When the letters were combined, his hidden message read, "Help me!"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
What’s a Whopper Got to Do with Anything?
After my heart attack, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage enacted a dietary regimen in accordance with improving my health.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
A guy had an awful day fishing on the lake, sitting in the blazing sun all day without catching a single one.
I'm doing one of those escape rooms today ... well, work... I'm going to work, but trying to figure out how t get out of it.
Matt: I invented a thought-controlled air freshener.
"The forest was shrinking, but the trees kept voting for the Axe, for the Axe was clever and convinced the Trees that because his handle was made of wood, he was one of them."
A negative situation can always be given a positive spin if one uses different language to tell the same story. For example:
In December of last year, our second great-grandchild entered our family. Our first great-grandchild was a boy, and this one is a girl.
There's not much happening at Cybersalt World Headquarters these days except for work, work, work! My brain feels fried!
At the end of last semester, a fellow student complained about how he failed the English course.
About four minutes into my run, I've decided I want to work on my personality instead.
"Archeologists will date any old thing."
"We have suffered bereavement after bereavement, but we are going to the land of the immortal where graves do not exist."
Our seven-year-old daughter was thrilled when we took her to Disney World for the first time, and she headed straight for Space Mountain. I worried that the roller coaster would be too scary for her, but she insisted.
This year, we celebrated our elder son's birthday on the 24th of April. It was a great day for us as we thanked the Lord and prayed for him. He cut the cake in front of the guests, and everyone congratulated him as he received the gifts. He then said to me, "Papa, I want to ask you a question." I replied, "Yes, definitely ask." He asked, "I have been with you for 12 years. How do you feel? Explain your feelings." Upon hearing this, I was shocked and surprised. The room fell silent. It was indeed an interesting and worthy question. I began to reflect on the past 12 years from his birthuntil the present day, as each year brought different feelings for him.
A noted psychiatrist was a guest at a gathering of humor editors, and his host naturally broached the subject in which the doctor was most at ease.
The banker fell overboard from a friend's sailboat.
I hope you heal from the things you still cry about when no one is watching.
The coach for the little league team had not yet learned the names of all the players, so he called them by the numbers on their uniforms.
A man runs into the vet's office carrying his dog, screaming for help. The vet rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his dog down on the examination table. The vet examines the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man that his dog is dead.
Behind every great man is the drawer I need to get into ... Why are you even in the kitchen right now?
An artist decided to buy a new easel.
Socrates: to do is to be
A lady came to a famous poet and handed him a piece of paper, explaining, "The Lord has given me this poem."
Several months ago, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage said she and her daughter and granddaughter were going to St. Augustine for a week and wondered if I wanted to go along.