Entertainment

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because they were trained professionals and I was in good hands.

"Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"

Helping his wife wash the dishes, a minister protested, This isn't a man s job.

Oh yes, it is, his wife retorted, quoting 2 Kings 21:13:

I will wipe Jerusalem as a man wipeth a dish, wiping it, and turning it upside down.

Several members who have been in the hospital are not on their way to recovery, for which we are thankful.

The Jack and Kill Daycare is looking for someone to help part time on Saturdays.

We'll kick off the Christmas season this morning with our first hymn, "The First Nowell"

Our Wednesday Night Family Cafeteria meal will feature a variety of Chinese dishes including One Ton Soup.

Events: December 9th, Christmas Caroling at the Parkview Nursing Home 7:00 p.m., December 10th, Breakfast with Satan 6:00 to 9:00 a.m. in the Fellowship Hall.

The Youth Group had a scavenger hunt, did face painting, and played a game called, "Find the gun." They had a great time.

The Pastor's Corner: A Personal Massage from Jesus

Due to Construction on the North side of the parking lot, we will soon be changing entrances. Please exit the new driveway which is the one in between the old entrance and the old exit. Please exit from the new exit which is the old entrance.

Our Senior's group is sponsoring a dance December 12. You can Dance the Night Away from 5:00 until 7:00 p.m. for only $5 per person.

What are you doing for Lunch Tuesday? Local Funeral Director Barry Gilbert will talk about the benefits of cremation.

The Riegieman Chiropractic Center will host Kid's Day this Saturday. They'll be treating the youth group to spinal exams, backpack checks, I.D. Cards, etc.

Here are some more strange warnings on items.

On a packet of juggling balls:
"This product contains small granules under 3 millimeters.  Not suitable for children under the age of 14 years in Europe or 8 years in the USA."

Seen on a camera:
"This camera only works when there is film inside."

On a bottle of flavored milk drink:
"After opening, keep upright."

On a can of windscreen de-icing spray:
"Spray works in sub-zero temperatures."

On a can of insect spray:
"Kills all kinds of insects!  Warning: this spray is harmful to bees."

A different brand of insect spray:
"Kills flies, wasps, mosquitoes, midges, and other flying insects.
Not tested on animals."

On an ocean buoy for determining the position of submarines:
"Protect from seawater."