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Monthly Archive

2004

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 579 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Ask Pastor Tim
Pastor Tim
7145

Stereotypical Attack On Jews

In response to the following joke (Telegram Scare):Schwartz and Feldman, partners in the garment industry, had just suffered through their worst season ever. Eight thousand madras sports coats were ha... read more..

God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
3245

Hurricanes Have Gone But Political Winds Are Blowing"

Within the last six weeks, that gusty quartet comprised of Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne has lustily serenaded Florida. A repeat performance is not in the foreseeable forecast - I hope.It is not t... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4360

Materialistic Or What?

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Jag XK-8 in front of the office, ready to show it off to his colleagues.  As he got out, a truck came along, too close to the curb, and completely to... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2490

Voting Tips

A couple of opposing candidates for county office happened to be sitting next to each other in the local diner...One turned to the other and said, "You know why I'm going to win this election? Becaus... read more..

Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
2763

Thanksgiving Sets Us Free

A South African man surprised nine men robbing his home. Eight of the robbers ran away, but the homeowner managed to shove one into his backyard pool. After realizing the robber couldn't swim, the hom... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4207

Technical Terms for the Strictly Amish

Log on: making a wood stove hotterLog off: don't add no more woodMonitor: keeping an eye on the wood stoveDownload: gettin the farwood off the truckMega Hertz: when yer not keerful getting the farwood... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2532

Next Pastor

Rev. Jones shocked the congregation when he announced his resignation from the church and planned move to Arizona...After the service a very distraught Mrs. Williams came to the pastor with tears in h... read more..

Racing
Pastor Tim
5896

Pastor of Disaster Returns To Track

{mosimage}Last Saturday night (Oct 09) the Pastor of Disaster (Tim Davis) returned to the track at Western Speedway, Victoria.Pastor Tim was driving backup for Chris Broughton in the #37 Cybersalt.org... read more..

The Spur
Marcia Lee Laycock
2600

Finding Your Way Home

I was on a plane somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean when I had the first dream. As most dreams are, it was confusing, full of images and scraps of sound that, though vivid and realistic were disjointed... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4097

Pilot Humor

Here are some actual maintenance complaints generally known as squawks or problems submitted recently by Qantas pilots to maintenance engineers.  After attending to the squawks prior to the aircr... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3980

Y to K Problem

Our staff has completed the 18 months of work on time and on budget. We have gone through every line of code in every program in every system.  We have analyzed all databases, all data files, in... read more..

Dr. Harold McNabb
Pastor Tim
2983

Give Thanks With a Grateful Heart

Luke 12: 13-34(for Canada's Thanksgiving)A teacher asked her students to list what they thought were the present Seven Wonders of the World. The students cast the most votes for:1. Egypt's Great Pyram... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2381

One Per Point

One day a professor was giving a big test to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in.The profe... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4549

Pillsbury Dough Boy Dead at 71

Veteran Pillsbury spokesman, Pop N.  Fresh, died yesterday of a severe yeast infection.  He was 71.Fresh was buried in one of the largest funeral ceremonies in recent years.  Dozens of ... read more..

Barb's Mantle
Pastor Tim
3207

Victory In Defeat

  1 John 5:4 For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith. Nothing in this world is perfect. We strive to be perfect, read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2751

Taxi Craze

Jill had to grab a cab to get to a meeting uptown. She hailed one down, got in, and told the cabbie the address she needed. The cabbie turned out to be a lunatic driver, and Jill sat in the backseat c... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4214

Someone At The Door

A priest is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street.  However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high ... read more..

Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
2644

You Will Always Be Rich Enough to Be Generous

2 Corinthians 9:6-15 I love hearing stories of faith. I especially love the ones in which someone up against incredible odds puts their faith God, and follows the Lord's plan rather than their ow read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2359

Pitching Control

A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked out to have a talk with him. "I've figured out your problem," he told the young southpaw. "You always seem to lose control at the sa... read more..

Melva's Devotions
Melva Cooper
3796

God's Craftsmanship

"The heavens tell of the glory of God.The skies display his marvelous craftsmanship."Psalm 19:1 (NLT) My husband and I spent several days in sunny Southern California.  There are very few places read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3740

Comprehending Engineers

Take One A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers.  The engineer fumed, "What's with these guys?  We must have been waiting for ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2565

Missed Call

My daughter Marina worked in my law office while she attended graduate school. One morning a call came in for her. I said she wasn't in yet and offered to take a message. The caller said she'd phone ... read more..

Peggie's Den
Peggie Bohanon
3862

The Indescribable Christ!

Describe Jesus Christ--call Him a teacher, a prophet, a good man, the Son of God--but whatever your beliefs, at some point, you will exhaust the capabilities of the English language, or any language, ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2340

Help Is Nearby

My partner and I were in our police car when we were dispatched to break up a domestic dispute. We spoke with the couple, and the problem was quickly resolved.On leaving, I was admiring the craftsman... read more..

Melva's Devotions
Melva Cooper
3977

Receive God's Blessings

"'the Lord pours down His blessings. Our land will yield its bountiful crops."Psalm 85:12 (NLT) I love fall! The long days of summer are very hot and humid. Suddenly, you notice when you step outsi read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3929

You Get What You Paid For

During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer: "Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows.  When you get to me and the part where I'm to pr... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2723

Golf Cheater

Sitting at a table in the clubhouse after a game, Joe said to a fellow club member, "I'm not about to play golf with Jim Walsh anymore. He cheats.""Why do you say that?""Well, he found his lost ball ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4085

Y Zero K bug

Message from: Rome January 18, 1 BC Dear Cassius, Are you still working on the Y zero K problem?  This change from BC to AD is giving us a lot of headaches and we haven't much time left.  I ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2507

Ten Reasons Why Men Should Join The Choir

*Ten Reasons Why Men Should Join The Choir*10. Rehearsals are every Wednesday night. This means that for those few hours, you will significantly reduce your risk of contracting tendonitis from nonstop read more..

The Spur
Marcia Lee Laycock
3089

A Woman Who Learned What Was Needed

How many times this week has someone asked, "How are you?" How many times have you answered, "Fine, but busy." It has become my standard answer these days and sometimes that bothers me. There's a read more..

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