Click here to view this edition online!
Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings everyone.
We got to spend some time with our son this past week as he installed some baseboards at Cybersalt World Headquarters. You may remember that back in the fall he also did the flooring upstairs. Grandma Cybersalt and I thought we could do the baseboards ourselves, but we let wisdom prevail and asked him to do it.
He did a really great job! He really won the day in some tricky areas with some precise craftsmanship that I would never have been able to pull off. Susan is thrilled, which means I am doubly happy with the results!
Today's video share is about some workers who have an incredibly hard and dangerous job. It really puts many of life's hardships and trials in perspective - which is always an opportunity for gratefulness. Surviving day to day life is such a hard thing for so many people!
Click here to watch the video.
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Top 7 Signs Your Pastor Needs a Vacation
7. His first words to the congregation on Sunday morning are "All right, listen up you heathens..."
6. He falls asleep during his own sermon.
5. He shows up for Sunday service wearing Bermuda Shorts and a Tank Top.
4. Every time his smartphone notifications ding, he shouts, "Why can't they just leave me alone?!"
3. Announces baptismal services will be at the Grand Canyon.
2. You go to his office for counseling and pour your heart out to him and he says, "Sounds like a personal problem to me."
AND THE NUMBER ONE SIGN YOUR PASTOR NEEDS A VACATION
1. For the past two months he has preached the same sermon every Sunday.
One-Liner #1635
When I was a kid I wanted to be older ... this is not what I expected.
"Be a Billionaire!"
and Help
Refugees and
Persecuted Christians
Northern Vision
"I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but he turned out to be an optical Aleutian."
Quote #2072
"Christianity does not provide the reason for each experience of pain, but it does provide deep resources for actually facing suffering with hope and courage rather than bitterness and despair."
- Timothy Keller
Interpreting, Reading Into the Text
An engineer, a psychologist, and a theologian were hunting in the wilderness of northern Canada.
Suddenly, the temperature dropped and a furious snowstorm was upon them. They came across an isolated cabin, far removed from any town. The hunters had heard that the locals in the area were quite hospitable, so they knocked on the door to ask permission to rest.
No one answered their knocks, but they discovered the cabin was unlocked and they entered. It was a simple place ... 2 rooms with a minimum of furniture and household equipment. Nothing was unusual about the cabin except the stove. It was large, pot-bellied, and made of cast-iron. What was strange about it was its location ... it was suspended in midair by wires attached to the ceiling beams.
"Fascinating," said the psychologist. "It is obvious that this lonely trapper, isolated from humanity, has elevated this stove so that he can curl up under it and vicariously experience a return to the womb."
"Nonsense!" replied the engineer. "The man is practicing the laws of thermodynamics. By elevating his stove, he has discovered a way to distribute heat more evenly throughout the cabin."
"With all due respect," interrupted the theologian, "I'm sure that hanging his stove from the ceiling has religious meaning. Fire LIFTED UP has been a religious symbol for centuries."
The three debated the point for several hours without resolving the issue. When the trapper finally returned, they immediately asked him why he had hung his heavy pot-bellied stove from the ceiling.
His answer was succinct. "Had plenty of wire, not much stove pipe."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . .
What’s so Cool about a Cucumber?
When it comes to vegetables, I am no connoisseur at all. The only vegetable I really like is carrot cake. According to The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, that is not a vegetable.
We often discuss vegetables, and she has brought to me a lot of proof that carrot cake is not a vegetable.
"Why then," I argue, "do they use the word carrot when they talk about this particular cake."
She will then stare at me, one of her vicious stares by which I get the message.
Read moreThe Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
I want to give a shoutout to Cybersaltine G. Keeler whom I had the pleasure of meeting over Zoom yesterday. He and I talked a bit of shop about a website project he is planning.
The following was overheard at a recent high society party...
My doctor e-mailed me asking if I knew my "blod group".
"The advice I would give [the younger me] - or any young person - would be "Keep your head up in failure and your head down in success."
Lovers of the English language might enjoy this: How do non-natives ever learn all the nuances of English?
If you remember a time in the past that you forgot Valentine's day and doing so created awkwardness and pain in some way, remember that tomorrow is Valentine's Day!
Marriage Counselor: Your wife says you never buy her flowers. Is that true?
The worst thing about getting hit in the face with Pi is it never ends.
"If you work through the tough times, the respect and love that you feel deepens."
Hugging: The Perfect Care for What Ails You
Recently, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and her spouse took a short vacation that was long overdue. Vacations are very hard to organize and schedule when you have a busy life. But, thanks to the ingenuity of my wife, we were able to plan out a vacation.
There was no mailing last Sunday. Grandma Cybersalt and I enjoyed a full house with some of our kids and grandkids visiting on the weekend! Since I am the night owl of the two of us, Susan turned in early and I stayed up to work on a few things. It was not until 4:00am on Sunday morning that I finished writing the news and then noticed Susan had not lined up the content for the Sunday issue. At that point I opted for some sleep for myself, lol.
A famous author was autographing copies of his new novel in a Cleveland department store. One gentleman pleased him by bringing up not only his new book for signature, but reprint editions of his two previous ones as well.
I love approaching 80 - I learn something new every day and forget five other things!
While visiting a friend who was in the hospital, I noticed several pretty nurses, each of whom was wearing a pin designed to look like an apple.
"Thank you, dear God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough."
Raising teenagers is a challenge, so my hubby and I came up with the following rules to help the kids understand what was expected of them during their pre-adult status.
I am not what you would call a superstitious person. [Knock on wood.] I am a realist in a modified definition of that word and I usually take things as they come.
Thank you for your kind words and suggestions after I shared about my probable ulcer a few weeks back. I have not had any further problems since I started taking the medication. I am to take it daily for 60 days and will be following up with my doctor. It's nice to not have the added stress of falling behind in my work because of the effects of stress!
Two factory workers were talking. "I know how to get some time off from work," said the man.
Life is like a helicopter ... I don't know how to operate a helicopter.
Once upon a time, when seals had tremendous political clout, Dianne Feinstein (the former mayor of San Francisco, now Senator) was running for governor. An opposing candidate had a nightmare in which the ex-mayor was victorious in the election, thanks to the convincing campaigning of some savvy seals.
Please remember:
We were driving our three-year-old son to his Grandma's home when we stopped at a store. Once inside, our son decided he wanted one of those large gumballs.