Cybersalt Digest Archive

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Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

Last Sunday I shared a zoomed in picture I took of a snail and when referring to the snail commented, "I spotted this tiny boy or girl snail (I'm sure someone out there can tell the difference so I'm covering my bases.)"

Well, apparently I didn't zoom in far enough (or maybe it was just because the water was cold) because Andr D. kindly emailed and let me know that snails are hermaphrodites. That means they need only look in a mirror when looking for a date.

However, I imagine being both genders is not all fun and games for snails. I wonder if snails:

• come home at the end of the workday day wanting to just sit down and read the paper while still needing to talk about how their day was.
• are forever internally conflicted wondering if they are being honest when they say that shell doesn't make their hips look wide.
• endure silent car rides home after parties because they can't believe they said that harmless thing which is really no big deal anyway.
• sit on a mall bench outside a store wondering why it's taking so long to buy some socks.

Of course, I am being ridiculous - as confirmed by the look on Grandma Cybersalt's face when I just read my first draft to her.

But really, why should I have all all the fun or get all the looks? If you have an idea why it's hard for snails to be hermaphrodites, just reply to this email and tell me and I'll share a collection of all the family-friendly submissions.

Speaking of the French (they do enjoy eating snails, you know) I just added a shopping cart to the site of a new client who sells a home school curriculum for learning French. He was having people email him to buy the course and ended up losing a lot of sales because they could not buy it right away when visiting. Anyway, since many of you are spending most of your time staying away from other people, maybe now is a good time to learn how to stay away from them in French! If that sounds interesting, check out the French Essentials website at:
https://frenchessentials.com/

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! 

~ Pastor Tim

9. "Hi, is this the chopstick hotline?"

8. "Okay, I removed the cap -- now what?"

7. "Can I use it to highlight passages in books?"

6. "Is it safe for my kitty's lips?"

5. "Is it true that the Chinese use these instead of forks?"

4. "I like to dress the tubes in tiny little clothes I make. Is this illegal?"

3. "Is it available in a spray?"

2. "I wrote a 22-page poem about Chap Stick. Where do I send it?"

1. "I lost my Chap Stick -- did anyone turn it in?"

This presents us with an insurmountable opportunity.

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Only Robinson Crusoe had everything done by Friday.

"Worship is not a twenty minute period during a church service; it's a lifestyle."

- Unknown

My poor wife was sick in bed with the flu. Being a dutiful husband, I offered to fix her some of her favorite herbal tea. I couldn't find the tea though and went back upstairs to ask where it was.

She said, "I don't know how it could be any easier to see. It's in the pantry, third shelf down, in a cocoa tin marked 'matches'.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

For several weeks, or has it been years, I’ve been waiting for an important package to come through the mail. I don’t know why they call it snail mail because I have seen snails crawl faster.

With all our technology today, you would think that mail could come in on a particular schedule, and I'm thinking of a fast-paced schedule.

I've been going to the mailbox every day for several weeks, and I find a lot of junk mail, but I don't find the mail that I'm looking for. They promised it would arrive between seven and ten days. Of course, they didn't mention what days they would come, nor did they say those days would be consecutive.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

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Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings everyone - and welcome to issue #4600!

A number of weeks ago I shared a picture I took in our backyard and in doing so misidentified an insect appearing in it.

Well, I've taken another picture that I am sharing here today. I spotted this tiny boy or girl snail (I'm sure someone out there can tell the difference so I'm covering my bases) on our carport wall today. So I brought it inside to see what I could capture with the macro tubes I have for my camera.

With every fiber of my being and everything crossed that I can cross, I hope that is actually a snail!

I like the world of the small, which is why I enjoyed the video I am sharing today. It is another from the "Smarter Everyday" YouTube channel. When we look into little things, we can see the power and wisdom of God in creation as much as we can in the big things.

You can watch the video by clicking here.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim

As he was drilling a batch of recruits, the sergeant saw that one of them was marching out of step.

Walking up next to the man as they marched, he said sarcastically: "Do you know they are all out of step except you?"

"What?" asked the recruit innocently.

"I said -- they are all out of step except you!" thundered the sergeant.

The recruit replied, "Well, Sarge, you're in charge -- you tell them!"

Grandma Cybersalt here. Tim didn't get this pun, but I liked it so you get to read it...

Lockdown can only go 4 ways:

You'll come out a monk, a hunk, a chunk or a drunk; choose wisely!

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

The problem:

There's a box with a hole at each end, and there's a rabbit in the box. The rabbit sticks his head out of the hole in one end, and a minute later he sticks it out the other end. Half a minute later, his head appears at the opposite end, a fourth of a minute later it appears at the end opposite to that one, an eighth of a minute later, etc., etc.

How long will it take before the rabbit sticks its head out of both ends of the box at the same time?

In theory, two minutes.

In practice, no answer is possible unless you split hares.

"Atheism is a strange thing. Even the devils never fell into that vice, for the devils also tremble and believe."

- C.H. Spurgeon

When my wife's sister, Patty, was very young, she was allowed to have her best friend, a boy named Rory, over to spend the night. As the children grew toward adolescence, their parents knew that someday the sleepovers would have to end.

One night, when Rory and his family were visiting, everyone gathered around the television to watch the Miss America pageant. When Patty asked if Rory could stay over, the parents hesitated, wondering if the time had finally come to discontinue the tradition. At that moment, the pageant host announced a contestant's measurements: 36-22-36.

"Rory," his mom asked, "what are those numbers?"

The boy thought for only a moment before responding, "Ninety-four?"

Rory got to spend the night.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

For several weeks, or has it been years, I’ve been waiting for an important package to come through the mail. I don’t know why they call it snail mail because I have seen snails crawl faster.

With all our technology today, you would think that mail could come in on a particular schedule, and I'm thinking of a fast-paced schedule.

I've been going to the mailbox every day for several weeks, and I find a lot of junk mail, but I don't find the mail that I'm looking for. They promised it would arrive between seven and ten days. Of course, they didn't mention what days they would come, nor did they say those days would be consecutive.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Click here to view this edition online!  

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Turkey Thursday! Happy Thanksgiving to all of our American subscribers and thank you, Walter, for reminding me!

I don't think chickens will be jealous because of loosing the Cybersalt limelight for one Thursday of the year.

After all, it's a break from what is usually eating them up!

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! 

~ Pastor Tim

I ate too much Turkey, I ate too much corn,
I ate too much pudding and pie.
I'm stuffed up with muffins and too much stuffin'
I'm probably going to die.

I piled up my plate and I ate and I ate.
But I wish I had known when to stop,
For I'm so crammed with yams, sauces, gravies, and jams
That my buttons are starting to pop!

I'm full of tomatoes and french fried potatoes
My stomach is swollen and sore,
But there's still some dessert so I guess it won't hurt if
I eat just a little bit more!

Half the lies they tell about me are true!

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

What does a turkey say? "Gobble, gobble, gobble," right?

Not always!

A jewelry-lovin' turkey?
"Bauble bauble bauble"

A dyslexic turkey say?
"Boggle boggle boggle"

A turkey in the shoe repair shop say?
"Cobble cobble cobble"

A turkey with a sore leg say?
"Hobble hobble hobble."

A football turkey say?
"Huddle, huddle, huddle"

A dieting turkey:
"Nibble, nibble nibble."

A turkey who argues a lot:
"Squabble squabble squabble."

What does Dr. Seuss' turkey say?
"Tweedle beetle paddle battle puddle wobble hobble gobble."

Then there was the dizzy Turkey who just went:
"Wobble wobble wobble!"

For the beauty of the earth,
for the glory of the skies,
for the love which from our birth over and around us lies,
Christ our Lord, to you we raise this our hymn of grateful praise."

- Folliott Sandford Pierpoint

1. Slow down; God is still in heaven. You are not responsible for doing it all yourself, right now.

2. Remember a happy, peaceful time in your past. Rest there. Each moment has richness that takes a lifetime to savor.

3. Set your own pace. When someone is pushing you, it's OK to tell them they're pushing.

4. Take nothing for granted: watch water flow, the corn grow, the leaves blow, your neighbor mow.

5. Taste your food. God gives it to delight as well as to nourish.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Click here to view this edition online!  

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings everyone!

From time to time we are blessed to experience others whose "soul container" is so different than that of ours that the armor of our tired and numb way of valuing others (or ourselves) is pierced with a hot reminder of the equal value and "humanity" of every soul.

That is what happened when I watched this weeks video share a few days ago.

You can watch the video by clicking here.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim

I pulled up to the drive-thru of a fast-food restaurant and ordered coffee. I asked the clerk to put some ice cubes into the cup so that I could drink the cool coffee quickly. At the window, there was a delay.

Finally, a teen-aged girl came to the window looking frustrated. "I'm having a problem," she announced. "The ice keeps melting."

He knew everything, but that's all.

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

When they finish a new hive, bees have a house swarming party.

"Your best shot at having a beautiful marriage is if both of you make it your goal to become more like Jesus."

- Francis Chan

It is said that when the famous American columnist Dorothy Parker first came to work at The New Yorker, she found herself isolated and lonely in her small office there.

Never one to be ignored, she managed to convince one of the janitors to paint the word "MEN" on the door to her office.

After that, she said, she met lots of new people, and all of them male, too.

"Only one thing," she added, "they always seemed to be in a hurry."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

I thought I had everything organized and in order. It just shows how useless my thinking is these days.

There are many piles in my office and on my desk, and I know what is in each pile. Everything is organized to my specifications. My rule is: if I can't find something, I don't need it. Believe me; there's a lot of things I don't need.

At the end of the week, I was finishing up my office area and closing it down for the week. I sighed a deep sigh of relief, knowing that my work for the week was done. Nothing is more satisfying than when a plan comes together.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.