Cybersalt Digest Archive

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Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

There is often a chicken focus on Chicken Thursday but today I need to address a controversy which has arisen in the Cybersalt world. I'm talking about "beegate."

On Sunday I shared a picture I took of a bee on a sunflower in my backyard. However, Marvin P. emailed me and let me know that that was no bee, but rather it was "a syrphid fly (hover fly) to be exact." Then Andra D. emailed me and also pointed out that this was a fly and that it, like some other insects, was pretending to be a bee (or not a bee - that is the question) in order to deter potential predators.

Now, both Marvin and Andra were very kind in the way they corrected me so please, nobody rush out and burn their houses down. I know some of you are very protective of me but I'm OK.

I blame my parents for this whole mess. Obviously their telling me about the birds and the bees stopped well short of full disclosure. Sure, I got the part about a mommy and daddy having a special hug, but obviously they sent me out into the world on my own, ill-prepared for understanding important non-sexual aspects of it. I'm not bitter, though, because there are still things I haven't told them.

And don't worry, this mistake won't stop me from sharing pictures either. Here's one I took, earlier today, of a duck in a pond near our house.

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! 

~ Pastor Tim

Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach that person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen."

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

The other night I ate at a real family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.

According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.

All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

Have you noticed that a slight tax increase costs you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents?

There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

I plead contemporary insanity.

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ."

"What makes you think you need all these?"

Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."

"Hate has never given any good advice."

- Ursula von der Leyen

My daughter spent the night over at my mom's house one weekend. She is 4 and full of mischief.

My mom told her, "You must behave if you want to stay again overnight.”

My daughter looked at her and said, "Yes your Majesty Princess Gramma of Coolness!"

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

To say the least, and I usually do, this summer has been quite a journey for the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and myself. I can't remember a summer equal to the one we just went through. The fact that we got through it is amazing.

We have been staying at home more often than usual, but I'm not complaining. What better night than the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and me sharing whatever we are doing?

One night this past week, I turned off the TV; we were getting ready to go to bed when my wife said, "What is that aggravating noise?"

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

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Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings everyone - and happy Canadian Thanksgiving in Canuckland!

This past Chicken Thursday I discovered that last Sunday's mailing never went out (I stopped one click short of "send" apparently.) So the rest of today's news is really last weeks news, except the last few days have been rainier, so there is some new news for you!

----------------------------

We have been having some really nice fall weather at Cybersalt World Headquarters.

Today I took some pictures in our backyard and I thought I'd share my favourite one of the bunch. It's of a bee on a sunflower our daughter gave us some months ago.

The image will appear small in the newsletter, but you can click on it for a large version. (Also, today's video share is further below.)

Today's video share answers the question, "How mad do you have to be to want to kill Billy Graham?" This is a great story that many would say was about God triumphing over evil, but I think it's an example of God winning over brokenness.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GeGqm4ocg8 

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!

~ Pastor Tim

My family traditionally begins the evening meal with a prayer of thanks.  When they were old enough, we began letting our children say the meal prayer.  Of course at first they would ask for a pony, a new bike, etc.  They soon learned the more important things which should be included in the prayer.

At Thanksgiving we had the whole family over.  My nine year old wanted to say the prayer.  It went like this:

"Heavenly Father, we thank Thee for the turkey, the rolls, the mashed potatoes, the red jiggly stuff, and the bread stuff even though I don't like it.  We ask that You not let us choke on this food."

Self-Annihilating Sentence:

A good system can transform complexity into chaos.

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Man: I'm new around here. Will you please direct me to the bank?

Little boy: I will, but only if you pay me ten dollars.

Man: Why should I pay you so much?

Little boy: Because bank directors are always highly paid.

"A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song."

- Chinese Proverb

In a fancy restaurant in Columbia, a rich patron started to choke on a bone. A man rushed over, reassured the Yuppie that he was going to be all right and identified himself as a doctor. He performed the Heimlich Maneuver. The bone popped out.

As the man's breath & voice returned he said, "I'm ever so grateful doctor, how can I ever repay you?"

The doctor smiled and said, "I'll settle for one-tenth of what you were willing to pay while you were choking."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

To say the least, and I usually do, this summer has been quite a journey for the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and myself. I can't remember a summer equal to the one we just went through. The fact that we got through it is amazing.

We have been staying at home more often than usual, but I'm not complaining. What better night than the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and me sharing whatever we are doing?

One night this past week, I turned off the TV; we were getting ready to go to bed when my wife said, "What is that aggravating noise?"

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Click here to view this edition online!  

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

Last week I said I'd have a surprise for you this week and since it is now this week here it is!

Cybersaltine D. McCordic recently emailed me a fun chicken themed cartoon and I thought it would be a great share on some Chicken Thursday. However, the cartoon was copyrighted. This would not stop some people from using it, but it's important to me to keep Cybersalt totally legal and above board (plus I have been told I have delicate features and would not do well in prison.)

Accordingly, I reached out to the cartoonist, Dave Coverly of the cartoon strip "Speed Bump," told him the story of Chicken Thursday and asked if I could use the cartoon in a future mailing. He graciously said, "Yes" and waived the regular usage fee!

So let's show him some love as a thank-you for joining in on our Chicken Thursday fun. Here are some links I selected to check out more about him and his work:

The SpeedBump Website - https://www.speedbump.com/

Who is Dave Coverly? - https://www.speedbump.com/about-1

Are you a cat person? - https://www.speedbump.com/#/cats/

Are you a dog person? - https://www.speedbump.com/#/weite/

For now, enjoy the rest of today's mailing! 

~ Pastor Tim

These, are real answers given by children.

Q: Name the four seasons.

A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

********

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.

A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists..

********

Q: How is dew formed?

A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

********

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?

A: Keep it in the cow.

********

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?

A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

********

Q: What are steroids?

A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

********

Q: What happens to your body as you age?

A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

********

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.

A: Premature death.

********

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen).

A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O and U.

********

Q: What is the fibula?

A: A small lie.

********

Q: What does "varicose" mean?

A: Nearby.

********

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"

A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.

********

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?

A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Self-Annihilating Description

Not having to get there is as good as a day in the country.

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

“Forbidden fruits create many jams.”

"A fall into a ditch makes you wiser."

- Chinese Proverb

It was Palm Sunday and, because of a sore throat, five-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a sitter. When the family returned home, they were carrying several palm branches.

The boy asked what they were for. "People held them over Jesus' head as he walked by," his older brother explained.

"Wouldn't you know it," the boy fumed. "The one Sunday I don't go, He showed up!"

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

Click here to view this edition online!  

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

I did it! I dealt with or managed every single email I received in the month of September. Between my business emails and personal emails there were over 350 different email threads, a thread being a singular line of discussion.

Last January I spent 3 days with my friend in Jersey on the way back from a forum I was invited to in Spain. While staying with him I noticed that he had zero emails in his inbox. That inspired me to strive for a zero inbox too. September was the first month I was able to pull it off.

I still have the goal of a zero inbox for the year so I will keep you posted on my progress. I also have a new organizational goal for October, but apparently saying what you are going to do sometimes tricks the mind into thinking it is already done it, making it harder to achieve a goal. So, I will tell you later if/when I reach that goal.

Oh yeah, I also have a "Chicken Thursday Surprise" for you next week thanks to one of those emails I received from Cybersaltine D. McCordic!

For now, enjoy the rest of today's mailing! 

~ Pastor Tim

Many years ago my wife was to knitting what Tiger Woods is to golf. She designed exotic patterns with ease.

There was an occasion when we had lunch in an authentic Chinese restaurant (only one person spoke partial English, all menus were in Chinese). When she saw the hand-written menu she was so impressed with the calligraphy she tucked the menu in her purse. Some months later I saw the result, a stunning white sweater with the Chinese symbols hand-stitched down the front.

She received compliments galore until one cocktail party when we met a distinguished Chinese physician who asked my wife where she got the symbols. He then wanted to know if she knew what they meant.

"I'm afraid to ask," she said, "but tell me anyway."

Even she had to laugh when he told her they read, "This is a cheap dish - but good."

Self-annihilating Description

From here on down, it's uphill all the way.

"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Should vegetarians attend meetings?

"To have courage for whatever comes in life - everything lies in that."

- Teresa of Ávila

Back in the day, I purchased a telephone-answering machine with a prerecorded message that used a male voice. When my mother returned from vacation, I forgot to mention it to her.

The next Saturday, the phone rang and the machine answered. After the message, there was a pause and the caller hung up. A second time and the same result.

Then the phone rang a third time. I heard, "This is your mother, I think. If I am, please call me."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Because of the situation we are in these days, the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I have spent some significant time watching mysteries. We enjoy a mystery movie.

I have always loved mysteries. I have read all of the Sherlock Holmes stories by Arthur Conan Doyle. I have read the Father Brown stories by G. K. Chesterton. And, don’t forget Agatha Christie with Hercule Poirot and Miss Marple. What wonderful mysteries created by these authors, and I have enjoyed reading the books as well as watching the movies based on these books.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.