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One-liners

A great collection of clean, funny one-liners!

One-liner #1394

woman3It will go on ad infinitum for awhile.

  • Logic One-liners
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One-liner #1393

woman confusedThe bubble has burst to some extent.

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One-liner #1392

woman surprised2Death is a once in a lifetime experience.

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One-liner #1391

man5You don't stand alone. I also stand alone!

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One-liner #1390

man smileOur product is best because all the others are average.

  • Truth One-liners
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One-liner #1389

mood"Essentially" is essentially meaningless.

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One-liner #1388

walking feetOn the sunny side of the street it's a little bit warmer.

  • One-liners
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One-liner #1387

man6I'm just itching to tell you about my allergies.

  • One-liners
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One-liner #1386

man thinkingI'm not indecisive ... unless you want me to be.

  • One-liners
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One-liner #1385

man grumpyI'm never at my best.

  • One-liners
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One-liner #1384

office writeSelf-Annihilating Sentences: Decisions

The executive committee proposes the following compromise:

make it optional for those who want it, and required for those who don't.

  • Office Jokes
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One-liner #1383

man somberOur lack or cooperation is mutual!

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One-liner #1382

frenchSelf-Annihilating Sentence

There is no other language but French.

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One-liner #1381

oscar wilde"He hasn't a single redeeming vice!"

- Oscar Wilde

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One-liner #1380

man restingIf you ever hear me order a decaf coffee, I've been kidnapped and am trying to signal you.

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  1. One-liner #1379
  2. One-liner #1378
  3. One-liner #1377
  4. One-liner #1376

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