Entertainment

Two friends went out to play golf and were about to tee off, when one fellow noticed that his partner had but one golf ball.

"Don't you have at least one other golf ball?", he asked.  The other guy replied that no, he only needed the one.

"Are you sure?", the friend persisted.  "What happens if you lose that ball?"

The other guy replied, "This is a very special golf ball.  I won't lose it so I don't need another one."

Well," the friend asked, "what happens if you miss your shot and the ball goes in the lake?"

"That's okay," he replied, "this special golf ball floats.
I'll be able to retrieve it."

"Well what happens if you hit it into the trees and it gets lost among the bushes and shrubs?"

The other guy replied, "That's okay too.  You see, this special golf ball has a homing beacon.  I'll be able to get it back -- no problem."

Exasperated, the friend asks, "Okay.  Let's say our game goes late, the sun goes down, and you hit your ball into a sand trap.  What are you going to do then?"

"No problem," says the other guy, "you see, this ball is florescent.  I'll be able to see it in the dark."

Finally satisfied that he needs only the one golf ball, the friend asks, "Hey, where did you get a golf ball like that anyway?"

The other guy replies, "I found it."

A businessman on his deathbed called his friend and said, "Bill, I want you to promise me that when I die you will have my remains cremated."

"And what," his friend asked, "do you want me to do with your ashes?"

The businessman said, "Just put them in an envelope and mail them to the Internal Revenue Department and write on the envelope, "Now you have everything including me."

A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's for the day. That night one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight point buck.

"Where's Henry?"

"Henry had a stroke of some kind.  He's a couple of miles back up the trail."

"You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back!?!"

"A tough call," nodded the hunter, "but I figured no one is going to steal Henry."

The start of the new school term always brings out the most interesting questions for computer consultants on campus. The predominant questions this term pertain to "getting into" E-mail and how to access the "Information Highway."

An obviously distraught student came into the consulting office yesterday complaining that his E-mail wasn't working; his attempts to get tickets for an on-campus concert kept resulting in returned mail.

He showed me the mail address he was attempting to reach. I asked him where he obtained such an unusual mail address.

He replied, "The sign told me, 'begins@7:30 P.M.'"