Monthly Archive

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 23133 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Johnny's Dust
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4239
<1min

Johnny's Dust

After church, Johnny tells his parents he has to go and talk to the minister right away.  They agree and the pastor greets the family. "Pastor," Johnny says, "I heard you say today that our bodi... read more..
Finished Chores
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3768
<1min

Finished Chores

My parents are both busy professional people and have trouble finding time for chores and home maintenance. On weekends they each make a list of things to be done. Father's list is never completely cr... read more..
Cowboy and The Preacher
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4720
<1min

Cowboy and The Preacher

One Sunday a cowboy went to church.  When he entered, he saw that he and the preacher were the only ones present. The preacher asked the cowboy if he wanted him to go ahead and preach. The cowb... read more..
A Private Hot Line to God?
Guest Authors
Pastor Tim
5562
7 min read

A Private Hot Line to God?

Does God talk to you personally? Would you bet your life on it? Claiming to receive personal messages from God on a regular basis places subjective experience on the same level as Scripture, Greg argu... read more..
Economics Exam
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
7164
<1min

Economics Exam

Not expecting to do well on the economics exam, Bill was heartened by the first question: In any given year, and to the nearest ton, how much wheat did the United States export?Smiling confidently, he... read more..
Weird Library Reference Questions
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4389
2 min read

Weird Library Reference Questions

All of these situations are real and some of them were mighty embarrassing.Enjoy! Part 1: Actual reference queries reported by American and Canadian library reference desk workers of various levels. ... read more..
Facing Sexual Temptation
Guest Authors
Pastor Tim
5804
4 min read

Facing Sexual Temptation

Adultery. Common word, common occurrence in our society. Lt. Kelly Flinn narrowly avoided court-martial for adultery and insubordination. Gen. Joseph Ralston left the candidacy for the top military po... read more..
Refrigerator Goals
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4180
<1min

Refrigerator Goals

When I returned home from college for a break, I noticed a paper posted on the refrigerator. It listed some goals my dad had set for himself: Help wife more; lose weight; be more productive at work.I ... read more..
The Whole In One
Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
4126
6 min read

The Whole In One

Recently I was officiating at a funeral where I did not know many of the family particularly well. As it was near Christmas, I decided to us the idea of Advent as a departure point. I said that Christ... read more..
Goober Stewardess
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4206
<1min

Goober Stewardess

An airline captain was breaking in a new goober stewardess.  The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place fo... read more..
One Call
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3316
<1min

One Call

The two teenagers were arrested. The police sergeant told them they were entitled to a phone call. Some time later a man entered the station and asked for them by name.The sergeant said, "I suppose yo... read more..
Alarming Discovery; Hit Me One More Time, Baby
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
4145
5 min read

Alarming Discovery; Hit Me One More Time, Baby

A man is not a man, in my opinion, unless he has adequately mastered the art of snoring. When I say mastered, I mean there is more to snoring than the mere act of making ze noise. It is an ancient art... read more..
Out of This World Bait
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4054
<1min

Out of This World Bait

My daughter-in-law Alma and grandson Eddy were digging for fishing bait in my garden.  Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his mother. "No, honey, he won't do for b... read more..
Proud Rooster
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
8674
<1min

Proud Rooster

A minister had just finished an excellent dinner at the home of a congregation member when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard."That's certainly a proud-looking rooster," the minister com... read more..
Peace
Rev. Spence Laycock
Rev. Spence Laycock
3597
9 min read

Peace

One of Christ's predictions of what would mark the end of time was the incessant cry from the world for, ?Peace, Peace!? This has come to be more than we could have ever imagined as the multiple layer... read more..
Goobers With Shovels
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4040
<1min

Goobers With Shovels

There were two guys working for the city.  One would did a hole, he would dig, dig, dig, the other would come behind him and fill the hole, fill, fill, fill.  These two men worked furiously.... read more..
Abbott and Costello - Computer Version
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3996
3 min read

Abbott and Costello - Computer Version

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer.ABBOTT: Mac?COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.ABBOTT: Your ... read more..
Same Sex Marriage In Canada?
Ask Pastor Tim
Pastor Tim
8678
2 min read

Same Sex Marriage In Canada?

DEAR PASTOR TIM, WHAT IS YOUR OPINION ON THE REPUBATED ANTI-BIBLICAL BILL THAT WAS PAST TO ALLOW REPUBATES TO MARRY? MY OPINION IS AS FOLLOWS: I AM THOROUGHLY DISGUSTED WITH CANADA AND THE FACT T read more..
Forgive And Forget
Barb's Mantle
Barbara Sanders
4621
4 min read

Forgive And Forget

Is it easy to hold grudges, rather than forgiving someone? Has someone done something to you or said a harsh word that you've had trouble forgiving? I ran across an article in a magazine where two Mot... read more..
Even More Cute Kids
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4511
3 min read

Even More Cute Kids

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old pages as he turned them.  Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it ... read more..
Between The Rock and a Hard Place
Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
4456
8 min read

Between The Rock and a Hard Place

In the spring of 2003 a young man named Aaron Ralston was hiking alone in the canyons of Utah when an 800 pound boulder shifted and pinned his arm to the canyon wall. He struggled for five days to fre... read more..
Back Off!!!
Hall of Flames
Pastor Tim
7616
<1min

Back Off!!!

Jessica wrote: Dear Tim, I Don't like what your sending me so BACK OFF!! You are an idoit!!!! From Jessie I replied: Dear Jessica, I've removed you from my lists. BTW, "Idoit" is spelled "idiot"... read more..
Memory School
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4572
<1min

Memory School

Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening as they have done for the past 35 years.  Max, the older, had been having problems remembering what cards were what, and usually needed... read more..
Visiting List
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3175
<1min

Visiting List

A Catholic priest I once knew went to the hospital to visit patients. Stopping at the nurse’s station, he carefully looked over the patient roster and jotted down the room number of everyone who had "... read more..
Give 'em Heaven
Guest Authors
Pastor Tim
5352
16 min read

Give 'em Heaven

What is it we're about as Christians? What is it we're doing? I want to talk about what I did the last couple of weeks. Some of you were around last year--I'd like to think that I have not lost any ... read more..
More Bad Headlines
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4295
2 min read

More Bad Headlines

~ March Planned For Next August ~ Blind Bishop Appointed To See ~ Lingerie Shipment Hijacked--Thief Gives Police The Slip ~ L.A. Voters Approve Urban Renewal By Landslide ~ Patient At Death's Door... read more..
Jack's Will
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3675
<1min

Jack's Will

Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's last will and testament."To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 50 acres of land, and one million dollars. To my son Ba... read more..
37 Plus 22 Equals Short Night For Pastor Tim
Racing
Pastor Tim
8843
3 min read

37 Plus 22 Equals Short Night For Pastor Tim

Pastor Tim Davis, known at Western Speedway as the Pastor of Disaster, was slightly injured last night during the first lap of the A heat in the Claimer Division. Davis, who was driving bac... read more..
How Amnesia Has Improved My Quality of Life
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
4615
5 min read

How Amnesia Has Improved My Quality of Life

Last week my wife sent me to the mall on an errand. Normally I don't like going to the mall, especially by myself, but when my wife sends me, I submit to my husbandly duty. Years ago when I joined her... read more..
Out of Fuel
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3437
<1min

Out of Fuel

Cessna: "Newark tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel."Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the Newark airfield in sight?!?!!"Cessna: "Uh, um...tower,... read more..
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