Cybersalt News

Palm Sunday greetings everyone! Yes, it's me again posting after another long absence.  There are a few things to catch you up on.

First of all, remember my article entitled, "Where Are The Nail Clippers?" The 88 year old lady who put that whole shopping trip into motion passed away a week and a half ago at age 90.  Even though Maisie has passed, she has kept me on my toes as her executor (I like to think I put the "cute" in executor) as I've discovered a few things she was up to that I didn't know about, lol.  I've updated that story with a picture of Maisie.
www.cybersalt.org/totally-tim/where-are-the-nail-clippers

Secondly, I had a blast at the premier of "Demo Dummies" last Wednesday night.  It's a great, gritty and intended for mature audiences documentary that tells the life story of some of the long-time demo drivers of Western Speedway.
www.cybersalt.org/cybersalt-news/demo-dummies-movie-released 

Thirdly, I've caught up on uploading my 10 most recent messages to the Westside Bible Church site.  You'll find them at:
www.westsidefamily.org/multimedia-podcast/messages 

Finally, new on the Cybersalt Site is an amazing video about "Gmail Tap" - the new Morse code keyboard app for smart phones.  I simply can't believe this video!
www.cybersalt.org/funblog/morse-code-app-for-smart-phones 

Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

Internet Cleaning

As many of you know, each year the Internet must be shut down for 24 hours in order to allow us to clean it. The cleaning process, which eliminates dead email and inactive ftp, www and gopher sites, allows for a better working and faster Internet.

This year, the cleaning process will take place from 12:01 a.m.. GMT on April 1st until 12:01 a.m., GMT on April 2nd During that 24-hour period, five powerful Internet search engines situated around the world will search the Internet and delete any data that they find.

In order to protect your valuable data from deletion we ask that you do the following:

1. Disconnect all terminals and local area networks from their Internet connections.

2. Shut down all Internet servers, or disconnect them from the Internet.

3. Disconnect all disks and hard drives from any connections to the Internet.

4. Refrain from connecting any computer to the Internet in any way.

We understand the inconvenience that this may cause some Internet users, and we apologize. However, we are certain that any inconveniences will be more than made up for by the increased speed and efficiency of the Internet, once it has been cleared of electronic flotsam and jetsam.

We thank you for your cooperation.

Interconnected Network Maintenance staff, Main branch, Massachusetts Institute of Technology

*****************

Please notify your friends relatives and business associates on this event so they too will be prepared.

One-liner #0832

"Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film."

As They Get Old Pun - Part 1

As They Get Old . . .

Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance.

Old actors never die, they just drop apart.

Old archers never die, they just bow and quiver.

Old architects never die, they just lose their structures.

Old bankers never die, they just lose interest.

Old basketball players never die, they just go on dribbling.

Old beekeepers never die, they just buzz off.

Old bookkeepers never die, they just lose their figures.

Old bosses never die, much as you want them to.

Old cashiers never die, they just check out.

Old chauffeurs never die, they just lose their drive.

Old chemists never die, they just fail to react.

Old cleaning people never die, they just kick the bucket.

Old cooks never die, they just get deranged.

Old daredevils never die, they just get discouraged.

Old deans never die, they just lose their faculties.

Old doctors never die, they just lose their patience.

Old electricians never die, they just lose contact.

Old farmers never die, they just go to seed.

Old garagemen never die, they just retire.

Quote #1281

"All change is not growth, as all movement is not forward."
- Ellen Glasgow

Judging Others

Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.

Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.

Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares.

Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles and blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together.

Heavenly Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share that love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity.

Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love.