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Cybersalt Digest Archive

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4902 - April 7, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone!

I just realized that every Sunday mailing this year has gone out with 2023 in the title. I am very disappointed in you, Raul el Perro!

nascar pov crashesThere was no mailing last Chicken Thursday as I was pretty preoccupied catching up on work after moving a client's web sites (totaling about 600 gigabytes in size) from their old server to my company. On top of that last week marked the completion of updating another company server that the Cybersalt Site is hosted on. Boy, was (and is) my brain tired from all that technical work! Later today I will definitely be enjoying some downtime when I go out for Pokemon Community Day with my daughter and son-in-law!

Today's video share is a collection of POV Videos of NASCAR Crashes. Come to think of it, they kind of remind me of what it its like in my brain lately while I try to keep up at work!
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 



Addicted to Thinking

man thinking 5It started out innocently enough.  I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up.  Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.

I began to think alone - "to relax," I told myself - but I knew it wasn't true.

Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.  I began to think on the job.  I knew that thinking and employment don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka.  I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is it exactly we are doing here?"

Things weren't going so great at home either.  One evening I had turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life.  She spent that night at her mother's.

I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker.  One day the boss called me in.  He said, "I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem.  If you don't stop thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."

This gave me a lot to think about.

I came home early after my conversation with the boss.  "Honey," I confessed, "I've been thinking..."

"I know you've been thinking," she said, "and I want a divorce!"

"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."

"It is serious," she said, lower lip aquiver.

"You think as much as college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"

"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and she began to cry.

I'd had enough.  "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped out the door. 

I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche.  I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big glass doors...  they didn't open. 

The library was closed.  As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye.  "Friend, is heavy thinking ruining your life?" it asked.  You probably recognize that line.  It comes from the standard Thinkers Anonymous poster.

Which is why I am what I am today: a recovering thinker.  I never miss a TA meeting.

At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was "Porky's."

Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking since the last meeting.  I still have my job, and things are a lot better at home.
Life just seemed...  easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.



One-Liner #1822

fishing boatIf you're ugly and sad, buy a fishing boat and just be ugly.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Contest

mallThere once was a sweepstakes that offered a shopping center as first prize.

The Supreme Court, however, ruled the contest illegal, since everyone knows you can't win a mall.



Quote #2257

prayer4"The most important Christians are not the ones who preach great sermons and write great books, but the ones who pray, and pray, and pray some more, sharing the quiet but effective victory of Jesus over all that defaces God's creation."

- John Piper, Lent for Everyone



Retirement

german shepherdMy partner and I pulled our police cruiser up behind a car stopped on the shoulder of the highway. We got out and asked the driver if we could help.

No, he replied, there was no trouble; he had just stopped to look at a map.

When we turned back, we noticed that his German shepherd had jumped in the open passenger-side front window of our car.

"You may think there's no trouble," I smiled, "but your dog obviously thinks he's done something wrong. He's in our patrol car."

He laughed. "He probably thinks you've come to take him to work," he replied. "He's a retired police dog."


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Why Does Monday Have To Follow Sunday?

mondayThe older I get, the more I wake up not knowing what day it is. That is particularly true on Mondays.

My favorite day of the week is Sunday. I enjoy attending church, fellowshipping with other Christians, and, of course, the Sunday worship services. I enjoy Sunday morning and evening like no other time of the week.

Since I became a Christian about 65 years ago, I have only missed a Sunday service when I was sick or had some emergency. Sunday is the most important day of the week for me, and it has been for years. I don’t see it changing anytime soon.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4901 - March 31, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Resurrection Sunday greetings, everyone - the Lord is risen!

the plateSusan and I pray the God will bless you and yours on this day when we celebrate the resurrection of Jesus. He died to pay the price of our sins so that all who trust in that sacrifice alone can be alive to God just as He is today!

Today's video share is a repeat, but an appropriate one for today: The Plate.
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 



Missionary Mimicking

crowd clappingA new missionary recruit went to Venezuela for the first time. He was struggling with the language and didn't understand a whole lot of what was going on. Intending to visit one of the local churches, he got lost, but eventually got back on track and found the place. Having arrived late, the church was already packed. The only pew left was the one on the front row.

So as not to make a fool of himself, he decided to pick someone out of the crowd to imitate. He chose to follow the man sitting next to him on the front pew. As they sang, the man clapped his hands, so the missionary recruit clapped too. When the man stood up to pray, the missionary recruit stood up too. When the man sat down, he sat down.

When the man held the cup and bread for the Lord's Supper, he held the cup and bread. During the preaching, the recruit didn't understand a thing. He just sat there and tried to look just like that man in the front pew. Then he perceived that the preacher was giving announcements. People clapped, so he looked to see if the man was clapping. He was, and so the recruit clapped too.

Then the preacher said some words that he didn't understand and he saw the man next to him stand up. So he stood up too. Suddenly a hush fell over the entire congregation. A few people gasped. He looked around and saw that nobody else was standing. So he sat down.

After the service ended, the preacher stood at the door shaking the hands of those who were leaving. When the missionary recruit stretched out his hand to greet the preacher, the preacher said, in English: "I take it you don't speak Spanish."

The missionary recruit replied: "No I don't. It's that obvious?"

"Well yes," said the preacher, "I announced that the Acosta family had a newborn baby boy and would the proud father please stand up."



One-Liner #1821

easter basket aiEaster egg hunts are proof that your children really can find things without Mom's help.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Confiscation 1

elastic bandsA rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.



Quote #2256

cross"The very first Easter taught us this: that life never ends and love never dies."

- Kate McGahan



Dying

child girl 1The Sunday School teacher was speaking to her class one morning and she asked the question, "When you die and go to Heaven...which part of your body goes first?"

Emma raised her hand and said, "I think it's your hands."

"Why do you think it's your hands, Emma?"

Emma replied, "Because when you pray, you hold your hands together in front of you and so I think God just takes your hands first."


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Dancing the Critter Bug Shuffle

lizard 3I must confess that I do have a liking for critters of all kinds. I enjoy feeding them out on the back porch, and boy, do they come hungry for their treats.

Two cats born in our garage are still hanging around. They come morning, noon, and night for their treats. In the morning, they like to come and have me scratch their head. I’m not sure what that has to do with anything, but I’m willing to scratch their head if that’s what they want.

Read more



The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4900 - March 28, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

flapping birdI had a major win at work this week! There was something I needed to learn to do in order to get one web server to transfer 500 gigabytes of files to another web server, with both web servers being who knows where in the world, lol. The actual "how" to do it was really bending my brain and then I realized that one of my team might be better suited for that. So I left it with one of my employees (who is 30 years younger than me) and he figure it out and showed me how to do it.

The major win for me is not that the problem was figured out and the data is being transferred. It is that I am learning to get out of the way and let others do things they are better at than me in my business. I can't spend/hire my way out of all my problems, but it sure is nice that I can with some of them!

Today's video share shows a cool effect when a bird's wings flapping in synced with a security camera's frame rate.
You can watch the video here.

 Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 



Definitions

word definitionADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL:
Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:
A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIPER:
A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.

HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.

INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MYTH:
A female moth.

RAISIN:
Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a time.

TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labour saving devices of today.

YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES:
Something other people have.  You have character lines.



One-Liner #1820

man thinking 3I wonder what the part of my brain that used to store people's phone numbers is doing now.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Circus Attack

jugglerWhat do you do if you're ever attacked by a circus?

Go for the juggler!



Quote #2255

crosses"Who believes what we've heard and seen? Who would have thought God's saving power would look like this?"

- Isaiah



Child Safety

child toddler 1I recall a time when my son was about 18 months old. I had him strapped into a backpack and was rushing to catch the bus. Apparently I mis-stepped and fell down an entire flight of stairs (13 to be exact). I was bruised and bleeding and had torn my jeans ... but my main concern was, naturally, for my child.

My fears were alleviated, though, when from behind me I heard a gleeful giggle followed by, "Again!"


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Susan Page writes . . . . 

Grace

swan- photo by Susan PageI have always loved the word grace. It sounds so, well … graceful.

It reminds me of the pure white swans that I love to photograph. The word is elegant, as is the swan.

Grace, God’s grace, freely bestowed, amazing grace. How sweet does that sound? We all know the hymn so well, but there is another old hymn that has always soothed my soul.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4899 - March 24, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone.

more zoetropesI am many months into my new habit of tidying up my desk and putting everything away each night. I am so enjoying the extra energy that comes from not having the distraction of clutter when I start each day and am working throughout it! If you thought you would try doing the same (after I mentioned it the last time) but haven't yet - don't give up because it is well worth it!

Today's video share is another one about Zoetropes. This Zoetropes Artist is taking them to a whole new level!
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 



Men, Dogs, Women

couple walking 11.  How Dogs and Men Are the Same

Both take up too much space on the bed.
Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
Both are threatened by their own kind.
Both are bad at asking you questions.
Neither tells you what's bothering them.
The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
Neither does any dishes.
Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.
Neither understands what you see in cats.

2.  How Dogs Are Better Than Men

Dogs do not have problems expressing affection in public.
Dogs miss you when you're gone.
Dogs feel guilt when they've done something wrong.
Dogs don't criticize your friends.
Dogs admit when they're jealous.
Dogs are very direct about wanting to go out.
Dogs do not play games with you-except fetch (and they never laugh at how you throw).
Dogs don't feel threatened by your intelligence.
You can train a dog.
Dogs are easy to buy for.
Dogs understand if some of their friends cannot come inside.
Dogs admit it when they're lost.
Dogs are colour-blind.
Dogs aren't threatened if you earn more than they do.

3.  Where Dogs Fall Down

Men only have two feet that track in mud.
Men can buy you presents.
Men don't have to play with every man they see when you take them around the block.
Dogs have dog breath all the time.
Men don't shed as much, and if they do, they hide it.

4.  Why Dogs are Better than Women

Dogs don't ask what are you thinking.
Dogs love it when your friends come over.
Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo.
Dogs think you sing great.
A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.
Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.
The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see you.
Dogs love red meat.
Dogs don't shop.
Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on the floor.
Dogs never need to examine the relationship.
Dogs love long car trips.
Dogs understand that instincts are better than asking for directions.
Dogs understand that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.



One-Liner #1819

man thinking 5“I worry about ridiculous things, you know, like how does a guy who drives a snowplow get to work in the morning… that can keep me awake for days.” 

- Billy Connolly



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Color Dreams

colors 2When you dream in color, it's a pigment of your imagination.



Quote #2254

palm sunday"But everyone who lined the streets had a different reason for waving those palms. Some were political activists; they’d heard Jesus had supernatural power, and they wanted him to use it to free Israel from Roman rule. Others had loved ones who were sick or dying. They waved branches, hoping for physical healing. Some were onlookers merely looking for something to do, while others were genuine followers who wished Jesus would establish himself as an earthly king. Jesus was the only one in the parade who knew why he was going to Jerusalem – to die.

He had a mission, while everyone else had an agenda."

- Bill Hybels



Christian Living

child boy beachLittle Rodney, 4 years old, walked down the beach, and as he did, he spied a matronly woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand. He walked up to her and asked, "Are you a Christian?"

"Yes." she replied.

"Do you read your Bible every day?"

She nodded her head, "Yes."

"Do you pray often?" the boy asked next, and again she answered, "Yes."

With that he asked his final question, "Will you hold my quarter while I go swimming?"


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Ice Cream Solves a Lot of My Problems

ice cream articleLike everybody else, I face problems almost every day. Or maybe I should say, my problem faces me.

Every Monday, when I get up, I say to myself, “How many problems will I have this week? How many will I solve?” Unfortunately, myself never replies back.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4898 - March 21, 2024

Click here to view this edition online!  

The Cybersalt Digest

Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday - and welcome to spring or autumn, depending on your hemisphere!

mushroom plays deadCalm has returned to Cybersalt World Headquarters following a two night, March break sleepover by two of our grandkids. A 9 and 5 year-old's celebration and testing of the relaxed rules of Grandma and Grandpa Cybersalt's house sure kept us on the go!

Today's video share shows that playing dead is sometimes the best strategy - especially if you can smell like you are dead too!
You can watch the video here.

 Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 



W-a-i-t-i-n-g

girl glassesThe two ladies were sitting in the living room, waiting for their hostess, who was slightly delayed. The daughter of the family was with them, on the theory that she would keep the visitors occupied during the wait.

The child was about six years old, snub nosed, freckled, buck toothed and bespectacled. She maintained a deep silence and the two ladies peered doubtfully at her.

Finally, one of them muttered to the other, "Not very p-r-e-t-t-y, I fear," carefully spelling the key word.

Whereupon the child piped up, "But awful s-m-a-r-t."



One-Liners #1818

child bedIt seems unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed that don't want to go to bed.



"Be a Billionaire!"

and Help

Refugees and

Persecuted Christians

Be A Billionaire!


Cemetery Workers

cemetery night"Cemetery workers always work the graveyard."



Quote #2253

ocean 3"A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor."

- Franklin D. Roosevelt



The More

hands holding 3The more generous we are,
the more joyous we become.

The more cooperative we are,
the more valuable we become.

The more enthusiastic we are,
the more productive we become.

The more serving we are,
the more prosperous we become.

The more outgoing we are,
the more helpful we become.

The more curious we are,
the more creative we become.

The more patient we are,
the more understanding we become.

The more persistent we are,
the more successful we become.

- William Arthur Ward


Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.


Susan Page writes . . . . 

His Watermark

Heron- photo by Susan PageI love nature photography. It is a hobby that I am quite passionate about, one which I never tire of. When I’m outdoors with my camera I lose all track of time and am in my “happy place,” like when I spend hours photographing the herons on the pond near my home.

I do not have professional equipment or an editing program that I’ve invested in. Maybe in time that will become a possibility, but for now, I’m content.

While researching how to put a watermark on a photo, I became fascinated by how many photography terms can draw a parallel to our spiritual walk.

Read more

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

  1. The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4897 - March 17, 2024
  2. The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4896 - March 14, 2024
  3. The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4895 - March 10, 2024
  4. The Cybersalt Digest - Issue #4894 - March 7, 2024

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