Cybersalt Digest Archive

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Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

Every now and then you just have to dig up the past, so that is what Grandma Cybersalt and I are doing at Cybersalt Word Headquarters this week. The street we live on is a major artery in our community and in recent years there has been a lot of new development surrounding us. This has resulted in our road becoming very busy.

It has never really been safe to back out of our driveway when we head out somewhere. To avoid doing so, we have always pulled up in front of our house and backed in after returning from somewhere. However, traffic has become so heavy at times that it's no longer safe to sit at the side of the road to wait to back in. So we are digging up our front front yard and replacing it with recycled asphalt. Ok, technically we are paying our son-in-law to do that work, and only after we failed to try and find Joni Mitchell to do it for us. 

Today's video share is a really impressive speech. I think you will enjoy 'The Power of Words' by Mohammed Qahtani.
You can watch the video here.

 Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 

A man was annoyed when his wife told him that a car had backed into her, damaging a fender, and that she hadn't gotten the license number.

"What kind of car was he driving?" the husband asked.

"I don't know," she said. "I never can tell one car from another."

At that, the man decided the time had come for a learning course, and for the next few days, whenever they were driving, he made her name each car they passed until he was satisfied that she could recognize every make.

It worked.

About a week later she bounded in with a pleased expression on her face. "Darling," she said. "I hit a Buick!"

I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.

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Sweets are the destiny that shapes our ends.

"Talent hits a target no one else can hit. Genius hits a target no one else can see."

- Arthur Schopenhauer

The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a natural-history lesson.

"Worker ants," she told them, "can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?"

One child was ready with the answer: "They don't have a union."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Susan Page writes . . . . 

- photo by Susan PageTo gather a harvest means some seed has been planted. Whether it is a seed of the beginning of something new, a seed of doubt, or a seed of faith, all these seeds will grow under the right conditions.

My youngest daughter and her husband had an idea to build a hobby farm. This seed blossomed beyond the dreaming stage, through the planning and the signing of the contract. However, there was a lot of hard and physically demanding work that came first.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

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Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone!

My good friend, Harold McNabb, shared today's news image on Facebook and when I saw it I was so struck by its wonderful truth that I had to share it with you today!

Today's video share shows the sunken wreckage of Earnest Shackleton's lost ship, Endurance. The story of his Antarctic expedition, and subsequent survival of he and his crew, is perhaps one of the greatest adventures of mankind!
Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 

In March 1992 a man living in Newtown near Boston Massachusetts received a bill for his as yet unused credit card stating that he owed $0.00.  He ignored it and threw it away.  In April he received another and threw that one away too.

The following month the credit card company sent him a very nasty note stating they were going to cancel his card if he didn't send them $0.00 by return of post.  He called them, talked to them, they said it was a computer error and told him they'd take care of it.

The following month he decided that it was about time that he tried out the troublesome credit card figuring that if there were purchases on his account it would put an end to his ridiculous predicament. 

However, in the first store that he produced his credit card in payment for his purchases he found that his card had been cancelled.  He called the credit card company who apologized for the computer error once again and said that they would take care of it.

The next day he got a bill for $0.00 stating that payment was now overdue.
Assuming that having spoken to the credit card company only the previous day the latest bill was yet another mistake he ignored it, trusting that the company would be as good as their word and sort the problem out.  The next month he got a bill for $0.00 stating that he had 10 days to pay his account or the company would have to take steps to recover the debt.

Finally giving in he thought he would play the company at their own game and mailed them a check for $0.00.  The computer duly processed his account and returned a statement to the effect that he now owed the credit card company nothing at all.  A week later, the man's bank called him asking him what he was doing writing a check for $0.00.

After a lengthy explanation the bank replied that the $0.00 check had caused their check processing software to fail.  The bank could now not process ANY checks from ANY of their customers that day because the check for $0.00 was causing the computer to crash.

The following month the man received a letter from the credit card company claiming that his check had bounced and that he now owed them $0.00 and unless he sent a check by return of post they would be taking steps to recover the debt.

The man, who had been considering buying his wife a computer for her birthday, bought her a typewriter instead.

This project is so important that we can't let things that are more important interfere with it.

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A friend of mine bought a new car that sported an on-board computer. One Sunday morning when he got into the car to drive to church, the digital display lit up. Glancing at the readout, he chuckled at the announcement:

"Time for service."

"The fruits of your labors may be reaped two generations from now. Trust, even when you don't see the results."

- Henri Nouwen

"Lord, give me the strength to change the things I can, the grace to accept the things I cannot, and a great big bag of money."

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

Often, I get agitated by people I call "idiots." I don't have an inclusive definition for what an idiot really is; I just use the word carelessly.

Especially is this true when I'm out in the neighborhood driving around. Sometimes, I'm in such a nervous frenzy when I get home, I have to sit down and drink some coffee. Often it takes 3 cups of coffee just to get my nerves to where they need to be.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

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Cybersalt News

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!

I'm off to the dentist today to get my teeth cleaned and to be reminded that I should remember to brush behind my front teeth as well! I do pretty well with brushing and flossing my teeth regularly, but I will admit that being fastidious about some of the finer details of oral hygiene does fall by the wayside when I've already had a day full of lots of little chores and tasks

Today's video share is a place I've been to a couple of times in my life and have been hoping to revisit on some of my recent trips back home. "Big Chute" is the only marine railway of it's kind in North America.
You can watch the video here.

 Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.

~ Pastor Tim 

Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court.  In court the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.

"Didn't you say at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,"' asked the lawyer.

Farmer Joe responded, "Well, I'll tell you what happened.  I had just loaded my favourite mule Bessie into the..."

"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted, "just answer the question.  Did you not say at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'."

Farmer Joe said, "Well, I had just got Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road..."

The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the highway patrolman on the scene that he was fine.  Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client.  I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time the judge was fairly interested in Farmer Joe's answer and said to the lawyer, "I'd like to hear what he has to say."

Joe thanked the Judge and proceeded, "Well, as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side.  I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other.  I was hurting real bad and didn't want to move.  However, I could hear ol' Bessie moaning and groaning.  I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans.  Shortly after the accident a highway patrolman came on the scene.  He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her.  After he looked at her, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Then the Patrolman came across the road with his gun in his hand and looked at me." He said, "Your mule was in such bad shape I had to shoot her.
How are you feeling?"

Sometimes you might feel like no one's there for you, but you know who's always there for you? Laundry. Laundry will always be there for you.

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Joseph Stalin's grave was a Communist Plot.

“It was one of those March days when the sun shines hot and the wind blows cold: when it is summer in the light, and winter in the shade.”

― Charles Dickens, Great Expectations

Windsor Castle, outside of London, is directly in the flight path of Heathrow International Airport.

While a group of tourists was standing outside the castle admiring the elegant structure, a plane flew overhead at a relatively low altitude, making a tremendous noise.

One particularly annoyed tourist whined, "Why did they build the castle so close to the airport?"

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Susan Page writes . . . . 

- Photo by Susan PageEaster is a time when we stop and reflect on the gift of eternal life through the sacrifice of our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. The Good News of the cross has the power to transform lives.

The topic of transformation is … quite frankly, transforming! We celebrate Easter at the time of year when we start to see winter transforming into springtime. Observe the renewal we see all around us. The tadpole changes into a frog. The caterpillar metamorphizes into a beautiful butterfly and the downpour of fresh spring rain brings renewal. Transformation is displayed in God’s very own handiwork.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he/she is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17).

Daily renewal in Christ changes our attitudes and revolutionizes our behaviour. Just like in nature, we, by faith become new creations in Christ Jesus and that’s a beautiful thing. New and improved, the salt and light that flavours and brightens our world!

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.

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Cybersalt News

Sunday greetings, everyone!

There was no Chicken Thursday mailing last week. Things were already pretty crazy workwise and on top of that I help a friend move. The move itself wasn't that bad because it was from one apartment to another in the same building - and there was an elevator! On top of that, he had hired to movers to help. They were both young men whom I was very careful to let carry all the heaviest things.

There are some men of my vintage who have not yet figured out what they think they can lift is more than they can actually lift, but I am not one of them. Since I have reached the point in life when I can hurt myself sleeping "the wrong way" I am more than happy to not hurt myself doing other things I think should come easily.

Today's video share shows an really interesting scientific project that is certainly not a "tankless" job!

Click Here to Watch

Enjoy the rest of today's digest!

~ Pastor Tim 

Basic Rules for Dogs Who Have a Yard To Protect

NEWSPAPERS: If you have to go to the bathroom while playing in the front yard, always use the newspaper that's placed in the driveway every morning for that purpose.

VISITORS: Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs.  Charge across the room, barking loudly and leap playfully on this person.  If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick its face and growl gently to show your concern.

BARKING: Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark.  So bark--- a lot.
Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house, especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds.  There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark...

LICKING: Always take a BIG drink from your water dish immediately before licking your human.  Humans prefer clean tongues.  Be ready to fetch your human a towel.

HOLES: Rather than digging a BIG hole in the middle of the yard and upsetting your human, dig a lot of smaller holes all over the yard so they won't notice.  If you arrange a little pile of dirt on one side of each hole, maybe they'll think it's gophers.  There are never enough holes in the ground.  Strive daily to do your part to help correct this problem.

DOORS: The area directly in front of a door is always reserved for the family dog to sleep.

THE ART OF SNIFFING: Humans like to be sniffed.  Everywhere.  It is your duty, as the family dog, to accommodate them.

DINING ETIQUETTE: Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor.  It's also a good time to practice your sniffing.

HOUSEBREAKING: Housebreaking is very important to humans, so break as much of the house as possible.

GOING FOR WALKS: Rules of the road: when out for a walk with your master or mistress, never go to the bathroom on your own lawn.

COUCHES: It is perfectly permissible to lie on the new couch after all your humans have gone to bed.

PLAYING: If you lose your footing while chasing a ball or stick, use the flower bed to absorb your fall so you don't injure yourself.

CHASING CATS: When chasing cats, make sure you never--- quite--- catch them.
It spoils all the fun.

CHEWING: Make a contribution to the fashion industry.  ...Eat a shoe.

I do all my own stunts, but never intentionally.

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A woman told a marriage counselor that her husband's complaint that he leads a dog's life is probably well founded.

"He comes in the house with muddy feet," she said, "tracks across my clean floors, barks at nothing, growls at his food and makes himself comfortable on my best furniture."

“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart.”

― Erma Bombeck

The bathtub was invented in 1850.

The telephone was invented in 1875.

This might not seem like much, but if you had lived back then, you could have sat in the bathtub for 25 years without being bothered by the phone.

Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.

Rev. James Snyder, God's Penman, writes . . . . 

If it were not for decisions, my life would be perfect. After all these years, I still wrestle with decision-making. I admit that I often don’t make good decisions.

I'm not sure, so don't repeat this, but I think The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage knows this and uses it to her advantage. How? I don’t know. She is the primary source behind my decision-making.

The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.