Monthly Archive

2005

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 957 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Bedtime Suggestion
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4034
<1min

Bedtime Suggestion

I'd had a pretty hectic day with my four-year-old. When bed-time finally came, I laid down the law: "We're putting on your pj's, brushing your teeth, and reading ONE book. Then it's lights out!"Her ar... read more..
Getting Older Lines
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4534
<1min

Getting Older Lines

Now that I'm older....here's what I've discovered: I STARTED out with nothing....I still have most of it. When did my wild oats turn to prunes and All Bran? I finally got my head together, now my... read more..
The Years of the Locust
Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
4558
7 min read

The Years of the Locust

Mt. St. Helen's is rumbling and puffing again, although it seems less likely this week that a big eruption is imminent, than it seemed a couple of weeks ago. I lived a thousand miles to the east when ... read more..
Shovel Need
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4475
<1min

Shovel Need

One morning a local highway department crew reaches their job-site and realizes they have forgotten all their shovels. The crew's foreman radios the office and tells his supervisor the situation.The s... read more..
A Dance Lesson In The Kitchen
The Spur
Marcia Lee Laycock
3984
3 min read

A Dance Lesson In The Kitchen

"What's Grandma like, Mom?" My daughter's question caught at my heart. I hadn't seen my mother since before she suffered a stroke and I was fearful. Had the effects of the debilitation changed her mor read more..
Computer Error
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3483
<1min

Computer Error

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called Bob the computer guy, to come over. Bob clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem. He gave me a bill for a minimum service call.As he was wa... read more..
Freedoms
Barb's Mantle
Barbara Sanders
5213
3 min read

Freedoms

We live in a land of freedoms. These freedoms are quickly being taken away from us. It started with prayer in the schools, and has escalated. Once the door is open to satan, it's hard to get it closed... read more..
More Actual Classified Ads
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4466
<1min

More Actual Classified Ads

More Actual Classified Ads - - - - - Stock up and save. Limit: one. - We build bodies that last a lifetime. - For Rent: 6-room hated apartment. - Man, honest. Will take anything. - Man wanted to work ... read more..
Chute Error
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3606
<1min

Chute Error

While being transported to basic training as a new enlistee of the Air National Guard, I accidentally opened a parachute in the rear of the C-47. The plane was piloted by a major and a captain, and I ... read more..
The Glory of the Justice of God
Rev. Spence Laycock
Rev. Spence Laycock
4961
9 min read

The Glory of the Justice of God

In the Supreme Court building in Geneva , Switzerland , hangs a massive painting by Paul Robert. The painting is entitled, ?Justice Instructing the Judges?. In the foreground are all forms of litigati... read more..
Bible Answer
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4957
<1min

Bible Answer

A father was approached by his small son, who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you "know" the Bible?" The son replied, "I do know!" "O... read more..
Cancelling Cards
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3832
2 min read

Cancelling Cards

Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to see happening, customer service being what it is today.A lady died this past January, and Citibank billed her ... read more..
Liberty at the Lamppost
Peggie's Den
Peggie Bohanon
4150
4 min read

Liberty at the Lamppost

Someone is always "declaring their independence" around here--so we celebrate the Fourth of July alot! But one day during spring break, the "Freedom Fighters" and three of their friends surrounded the... read more..
The Buck Stops Where?
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4970
<1min

The Buck Stops Where?

A one-dollar bill met a twenty-dollar bill and said, "Hey, where have you been?  I haven't seen you around here much." The twenty answered, "I've been hanging out at the casinos, went on a cruis... read more..
New Appointment
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3897
<1min

New Appointment

Defendant: Your Honor, I want you to appoint me another lawyer.Judge: And why is that?Defendant: Because the Public Defender isn't interested in my case.Judge (to Public Defender): Do you have any com... read more..
Theme Songs for Bible Characters
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
10093
<1min

Theme Songs for Bible Characters

Noah: "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" Adam and Eve: "Strangers in Paradise" Lazarus: "The Second Time Around" Esther: "I Feel Pretty" Job: "I've Got a Right to Sing the Blues" Moses: "The Wan... read more..
Life and Death
Barb's Mantle
Barbara Sanders
5166
3 min read

Life and Death

This week has been a long one for us and many others in our family and the church family. My husband's oldest sister was in the hospital for a couple weeks, in very bad shape. Her heart was not pumpin... read more..
Withheld Pay
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3563
<1min

Withheld Pay

After being laid off from five different jobs in four months, my Uncle Joe was hired by a warehouse. One day he lost control of a forklift and drove it off the loading dock.Surveying the damage, the o... read more..
Give It A Try
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5123
<1min

Give It A Try

Think of a letter between A and W.  Repeat it out loud as you scroll down.           Keep going!         Don't stop.....     &... read more..
Career Change
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4507
<1min

Career Change

When Ruthie's grandson Jordan was 5, he always told everyone he wanted to be a doctor when he grew up. One day he was running through the house and into the corner of a chair and hurt his eye. He crie... read more..
Fridge Magnet Smiles
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5175
<1min

Fridge Magnet Smiles

You have all seen those little hand painted signs hung in so many kitchens.  Many are heartwarming and homey, but many are simply hilarious.  Here is a collection of the funnier ones: A mes... read more..
Today, If You Hear
The Spur
Marcia Lee Laycock
3926
3 min read

Today, If You Hear

We were watching the portrayal of the last week of Jesus? life on earth. The actors depicted the Biblical characters with skill and the performance to that point had been flawless. Then a woman ran to... read more..
Words Per Day
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3379
<1min

Words Per Day

Abraham was reading an article out loud to his wife. "Did you know that women use about 30,000 words a day, whereas men only use 15,000 words?"Sadie replies, "The reason has to be because a woman has ... read more..
Amish At The Mall
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4880
<1min

Amish At The Mall

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall for the first time.  They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slid... read more..
End-Run
Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
4089
9 min read

End-Run

If anyone had a right to ask, "why me, God?", it was Hagar. Sure she had been a willing participant, but none of this had been her idea, and she really couldn't have refused her mistress Sarah. Now lo... read more..
Athiest Groceries
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5066
2 min read

Athiest Groceries

There was a Christian lady who lived next door to an atheist.  Everyday, when the lady prayed, the atheist guy could hear her.  He thought to himself, "She sure is crazy, praying all the tim... read more..
My Father...My Friend!
Peggie's Den
Peggie Bohanon
3879
4 min read

My Father...My Friend!

I love weddings! I sit misty-eyed beside my husband of twenty years, hold hands, get all warm and fuzzy inside, and feel like I am getting married all over again! Of course, I compare any wedding I at... read more..
Heartfelt
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4143
<1min

Heartfelt

Jimmy was at his first day of school. The teacher advised the class to start the day with the Pledge of Allegiance, and instructed them to put their right hands over their hearts and repeat after him.... read more..
The Claims of Baptism
Rev. Spence Laycock
Rev. Spence Laycock
3781
5 min read

The Claims of Baptism

The circumcision of Christ I claim and celebrate in baptism through faith in the working of God. I. The Object of My Faith is More Important than Amount or Intent. Through the first verses of this cha... read more..
Great Cheese
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3790
<1min

Great Cheese

The customer in the Italian restaurant was so pleased with his meal that he asked to speak to the chef. The owner proudly led him into the kitchen and introduced him to the chef."Your veal parmigiana ... read more..
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