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Monthly Archive

2004

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 579 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3871

Signs Your SUV Is Too Big

Signs Your SUV Is Too Big~ The last time you took your kids to a Monster Truck pull the parking attendants directed you right onto the stadium racetrack.~ When you replaced your tires, Goodyear stock ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4302

Funny Answering Machines

"Hi!  John's answering machine is broken.  This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets." "Greetings, you have reached read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3946

Helpful Executive

A young executive was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. "Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive an... read more..

Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
4229

Psychoceramics: God Loves Cracked Pots

A few years ago, my family visited the city of Delft, outside Amsterdam. That is the center of fine Delft pottery with its trademark blue and white pattern. We took the tour of the ceramic factory the... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2712

More Bulletin Bloopers

*More Bulletin Bloopers*The youth group has raised almost $500 for drug abuse."Correction: The following typo appeared in our last bulletin: 'Lunch will be gin at 12:15.' Please correct to read '12 no read more..

Cybersalt Shaker
Pastor Tim
4933

I Know Who Killed Jesus

(Originally written February 26, 2004) I saw Mel Gibson's movie "The Passion of the Christ" yesterday. I know who killed Jesus. I did. Of course I knew that before seeing Mel's movie because I have read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3864

Top 17 Inspirational Messages Not Heard at Work

(17) There is no "I" in "teamwork"...But there is in "management kiss-up". (16) If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday. (15) The light at the end of the read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2430

Illegal Turn

A man in a hurry taking his 8-year-old son to school, made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited."Uh-oh, I just made an illegal turn!" the man said."Aw, Dad, it's okay" the son said. "The poli... read more..

Barb's Mantle
Pastor Tim
4217

Stress Relief

In today's world, we go about things in such a manner, we are usually running around in circles. One thing is pulling us one way, another thing, another way. We spend our time worrying if we are going... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4130

Mr. Sugarbrown's Daughter

A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday Sc... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2429

10 Minutes Alone

After a day of grueling maneuvers under the blazing Texas sun, the platoon stood in front of the barracks."All right, ladies, think about this," bellowed the drill instructor. "If you could have ten m... read more..

The Spur
Marcia Lee Laycock
3796

Going Home With The Gold

The games are over. The winners have gone home with their medals, the losers with their shattered dreams. Watching the Olympics, I was impressed when the underdogs won and thrilled when Canadians di read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3764

Thoughtful Sidney

Sometime after Sidney died, his widow, Tillie, was finally able to speak about what a thoughtful and wonderful man her late husband had been. "Sidney thought of everything," she told them.  "Jus... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2772

Bathroom Break

On the first day of school, about mid-morning, the kindergarten teacher said, "If anyone has to go to the bathroom, hold up two fingers."A little voice from the back of the room asked, "How will that ... read more..

Melva's Devotions
Melva Cooper
4601

Carl Edwards - From Truck To Cup Racing

"I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should." I Cor. 9:27 (NLT) Michigan International Speedway saw an abnormal number of caution flags Sunday. Most of them were from read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3951

New Boater

This past summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, a fellow new to boating was having a problem. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't get his b... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2561

Strange 911 Calls

*Strange 911 Calls*A call came into 911 Emergency because two couples were going to share a hotel room and there weren't enough towels.A man called 911 and said: "Please connect me to Switzerland."A l read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4241

All Roads Lead Back to Rome

The U.S.  Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches.  That's an exceedingly odd number.  Why was that gauge used?Because that's the way they built them ... read more..

Dr. Harold McNabb
Dr. Harold McNabb
3672

How To Entertain An Angel

For those of you I haven't told, my grandson says he saw an angel in our worship one Sunday.Micah is almost 3 and his parents have raised him to know that Jesus loves him, and I guess he also knows ab... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2764

Clothes Hamper

I asked my two-year-old to take his dirty clothes and put them into the hamper.He looked puzzled, and I explained, "You know; it's the place where we put our dirty clothes before they're washed."My so... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4199

Wimpy Dad

One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her small boy into bed.  She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep... read more..

Melva's Devotions
Melva Cooper
4356

The Olympics

"For no one can lay any other foundation than?Jesus Christ. Now anyone who builds on that foundation may use gold, silver, jewels, wood, hay or straw. I Corinthians 3:11-12 (NLT) Athens has fore read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2393

Goober Compensation

If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:https://www.cybersalt.org/pastor-tim-s-cleanlaugh-site/what-is-a-gooberTwo goobers were talking.One was explaining to the other how ... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
4225

Better By Train

A large two-engine train was crossing America.  After they had gone some distance, one of the engines broke down.  "No problem," the engineer thought and carried on at half power.  Fart... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3729

Foreign Phrases - Sort of

A New York magazine recently ran a contest.  The rules were to take any well-known phrase in a foreign language, change just a single letter, and then provide a definition for the new expression.... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
3923

G.I. Excuses

The General went out to find that none of his GIs were there.  One finally ran up, panting heavily. "Sorry, sir!  I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late.  I ran t... read more..

Barb's Mantle
Pastor Tim
5113

Temporal Versus Eternal

'A woman's house is her castle'. And you just don't bother a woman's castle. I'm speaking from a woman's point of view. Many of us have things we cherish, and want to keep. We put them away, and forge read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
2359

Perfect Mate

At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends."The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sin... read more..

Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
11654

Ghandi Pun

Mahatma Ghandi walked barefoot everywhere, to the point that the soles of his feet became quite thick and hard. Being a very spiritual person, he ate very little, and often fasted.  As a result,... read more..

The Spur
Marcia Lee Laycock
5221

Praying with Our Eyes Open

The waitress placed a large bowl of salad in the middle of the table and handed plates all round. Spence and I chatted with our friends for another few moments, while the waitress poured tall glasse read more..

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