In Today's Issue
Cybersalt News
There is a new funny dog video on the Cybersalt Site today. You will find "Dog Squeak" at:
http://www.cybersalt.org/funny-dog-pictures/dog-squeak
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.
Today's CleanLaugh
Newlywed Grace
A recently married man was walking with his father one day and said:
"My new wife's cooking is so bad, we pray AFTER we eat!"
Today's One-liner
One-liner #0983
In the word "scent" is it the s that is silent or the c?
Today's Clean Pun
Split Pants
I split my favorite pants.
RIP.
Today's Quote
Quote #1431
"Our job is to love others, not wonder whether or not they deserve it."
- Thomas Merton
Today's Illustration
Life After Delivery
In a mother’s womb were two babies. One asked the other: “Do you believe in life after delivery?” The other replied, “Why, of course. There has to be something after delivery. Maybe we are here to prepare ourselves for what we will be later.”
“Nonsense” said the first. “There is no life after delivery. What kind of life would that be?”
The second said, “I don’t know, but there will be more light than here. Maybe we will walk with our legs and eat from our mouths. Maybe we will have other senses that we can’t understand now.”
The first replied, “That is absurd. Walking is impossible. And eating with our mouths? Ridiculous! The umbilical cord supplies nutrition and everything we need. But the umbilical cord is so short. Life after delivery is to be logically excluded.”
The second insisted, “Well I think there is something and maybe it’s different than it is here. Maybe we won’t need this physical cord anymore.”
The first replied, “Nonsense. And moreover if there is life, then why has no one has ever come back from there? Delivery is the end of life, and in the after-delivery there is nothing but darkness and silence and oblivion. It takes us nowhere.”
“Well, I don’t know,” said the second, “but certainly we will meet Mother and she will take care of us.”
The first replied “Mother? You actually believe in Mother? That’s laughable. If Mother exists then where is She now?”
The second said, “She is all around us. We are surrounded by her. We are of Her. It is in Her that we live. Without Her this world would not and could not exist.”
Said the first: “Well I don’t see Her, so it is only logical that She doesn’t exist.”
To which the second replied, “Sometimes, when you’re in silence and you focus and you really listen, you can perceive Her presence, and you can hear Her loving voice, calling down from above.”
- Útmutató a Léleknek (Originally written in Hungarian by Útmutató a Léleknek, translated by Miranda Linda Weisz)
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
David filled his car with gas at a self-service gas station.
A man decides to join the circus. He shows up to demonstrate his skills to Morris, the circus impresario.
"If everything tastes like us, why do we have to die?"
"Actually, it should be The King and *ME*"
"Last man standing" is the winner in most contests, but the runner up in musical chairs.
Apparently not everyone is fed up with telephone-answering machines. At the newspaper office where I work, we have several of them for different departments.
We had spent the day moving from our farmhouse into our new house in town.
I wonder if clouds ever look down on us and say, "Hey, that one looks like an idiot!"
You should be able to park in an “expecting mother” parking space if you’re waiting for your mom.
"There is a thin line between a long church service and a hostage situation."
Teacher Debbie Moon's first graders were discussing a picture of a family. One little boy in the picture had a different hair color than the other members. One of her students suggested that he was adopted.
The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season.
Early mornings are great for spending time with the family: then they spoil it by waking up.
Retired astronauts are paid exorbitantly.
"Nobody beats Vitas Gerulaitis 17 times in a row."
A company was hiring new staff. One question in the written application was: