Issue #4478
Cybersalt News
Sunday greetings everyone!
This past week, I made another trip to Avatar Grove here on Vancouver Island. I thought I'd share a picture of myself with a different tree there. This is perhaps the largest example of a "nurse log" I or anyone will ever see. Basically, a tree fell and died a very long time ago and a seed landed on it and grew from there. These are both cedar trees, which is why I think the nurse log has not yet rotted away in the hundreds of years it has taken for the tree to grow on top of it (and shelter it.)
New on the Cybersalt Site today, Rev. James Snyder recently celebrated 48 years of marriage. The passage of that time has him searching for St. Sanity. You can read "I Sure Do Miss St. Sanity" at:
www.cybersalt.org/gods-penman/i-sure-do-miss-st-sanity
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Summer Camp
A counselor was helping his kids put their stuff away on their first morning in Summer Camp.
He was surprised to see one of the youngsters had an umbrella.
The counselor asked, "An umbrella?? Why did you bring an umbrella to camp?"
The kid answered, "Did you ever have a mother?"
Today's One Liner
One-Liner #1404
Thinking is the last thing on my mind!
Today's Clean Pun
Are You Surprised?
Remember when plastic surgery was a taboo subject?
Now you mention Botox and nobody raises an eyebrow.
Today's Quote
Quote #1845
"A lack of boundaries often invites a lack of respect."
- Toby Mac #SpeakLife
Today's Illustration
Odd Facts
Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?
A. Conception.
Q. What distinguishes "60 Minutes" on CBS from every other TV show?
A. No theme song.
Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace.
Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular?
A. Obsession
Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to count until you found the letter "A"?
A. One thousand
Q. What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All invented by women.
Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
Q. Back in the day, when people placed "collect" phone calls, more collect calls were placed on which day of the year?
A. Father's Day
Q. What trivial fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic?
A. He didn't like to eat carrots.
Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party?
A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
Oh look, Chicken Thursday - wow, it's the middle of August all ready!
A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse's trainer meets him before the race and says, "All you have to remember with this horse is that every time you approach a jump, you have to shout, 'ALLLLEEE OOOP!' really loudly in the horse's ear. Providing you do that, you'll be fine."
She's genuinely bogus!
Don't eat the French fish ... it's poisson!
The phone rang. It was a salesman from a mortgage refinance company. "Do you have a second mortgage on your home?"
Bob had finally made it to the last round of the $50,000 Question. The night before the big question, he told the host MC that he desired a question on American History.
My identity lies in NOT knowing who I am.
While most puns make me feel numb, mathematics puns make me feel number.
We all need time to grieve--
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
Weary of constantly picking clothes up from the floor of her son's room, a mother finally laid down the law: each item of clothing she had to pick up would cost her son 25 cents.
Self-Annihilating Sentences
What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?
An old farmer wins the ten million dollar lottery and is being interviewed. The reporter asked what he is going to do with all the money.
After watching the movie Cinderella, five-year-old Sarah started using her pinwheel as a magic wand, pretending she was a fairy godmother. "Make three wishes," she told her mother, "and I'll grant them."
Competition for the apathy prize is keen!
CYCLOPS: How do you spell Hawaii?
This is a little story about four people named