Cybersalt News
The newest Funny Picture on the Cybersalt Site shows a couple of guys who obviously have missed a few human resources seminars. You'll find "No Girls Allowed" at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-signs/no-girls-allowed
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! ~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Extra Languages
A Swiss man, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two guys are waiting.
"Entschuldigung, koennen Sie Deutsch sprechen?" he asks.
The two guys just stare at him.
"Excusez-moi, parlez vous Francais?" he tries. The two continue to stare.
"Parlare Italiano?" No response.
"Hablan ustedes Espanol?" Still nothing.
The Swiss guy drives off, extremely disgusted.
The first guy turns to the second and says, "Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language."
"Why?" says the other.
"That guy knew four languages, and it didn't do him any good."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1053
Children seldom misquote you; in fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.
Today's Clean Pun
Math Decorator
Hey Archimedes, I love what you've done with displace!
Today's Quote
Quote #1501
Jesus did not say “Come to my seminar.” Or “Come to my conference.” Jesus said “Come to my table;” “Come and dine;” “Come and see” and "Come to me."
- Leonard Sweet
Today's Illustration
Bus Stop
Once there was couple traveling on a bus in a mountainous area. Close to their destination they decided to get off a bit early and enjoy a short walk the rest of the way.
After the couple got off the bus, it proceeded on its route, but 100 feet later a huge boulder fell on the bus, crushing it and killing everybody on board.
Upon see this happen the couple said, "We wish we were on that bus."
Why do you think they said that?
Think about it and then scroll down for the answer.
--------- Answer !!!! ---------
If the couple had remained on the bus instead of deciding to get off, the resulting time delay would have been avoided and the rock would have fallen after the bus had passed.
Remember and consider others in life.
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young engineer fresh out of MIT what kind of a salary he was looking for.
Love may be blind but marriage is a real eye-opener.
In order to catch a bus, one must first learn to think like a bus.
In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10 year old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water in front of him.
"I play golf in the low 80's," the little old man was telling one of the young boys at the club.
The hardness of butter is directly proportional to the softness of bread.
I know a lot about pop; I guess you could say I'm a Fizzisist.
For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
My favorite exercise is a combination of a lunge and a crunch. It's called lunch.
Ruth went to her mail box and there was only one letter. She picked it up and looked at it before opening, but then she looked at the envelope again. There was no stamp, no postmark, only her name and address. She read the letter:
A young minister sitting down to dinner was about to say grace when he opened the casserole dish that his thrifty new bride had prepared from all of the refrigerator leftovers.
The best inheritance parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day. 
The sign said “WET PAINT” so I emptied my Dasani water bottle on it. 
In ancient Greece, Socrates was reputed to hold knowledge in high esteem.