Cybersalt News
Oh look, Chicken Thursday! It's even "chickenier" this week thanks to Cybersaltine, Martha Long, who dressed her dogs up in a chicken costume and submitted pictures of them through the Cybersalt Facebook Page; Trixi is on the left and Noodles is on the right.
I think all of this is a hoot. If you want to help "chickenup" Chicken Thursdays please go ahead and send your chicken stuff in (no, not THAT chicken stuff) through the Facebook Page or directly by e-mail to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. .
In the spirit of Chicken Thursday, the newest Funny Picture on the Cybersalt Site has 2 chickens in it. Check out "Election Results" at:
www.cybersalt.org/funny-cat-pictures/election-results
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing! ~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
A Brother Names the Babies
A pregnant woman from Washington, D.C., (whose husband was out of the country) gets in a car accident and is knocked unconscious.
When she wakes up 3 days later she sees that she is no longer pregnant and frantically asks the doctor about her baby.
The doctor replies, "Ma'am you had twins! - a boy and a girl. We couldn't reach your husband and since your brother was the first one here the day they were born we let him name them for you."
The woman thinks to herself, "No, not my brother ... he's not very bright!"
She asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?"
"Denise."
"Wow, that's not a bad name, I like it! What's the boy's name?"
"Denephew."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1057
The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
Today's Clean Pun
Narcissistic Humility
I love this guy in the mirror: but that’s just me.
Today's Quote
Quote #1505
"When I regarded God as a tyrant, I thought sin a trifle; but when I knew him to be my father, then I mourned that I could ever have kicked against him. When I thought that God was hard, I found it easy to sin; but when I found God so kind, so good, so overflowing with compassion, I smote upon my breast to think that I could ever have rebelled against one who loved me so, and sought my good."
- C. H. Spurgeon
Today's Illustration
Preparing for Parenthood
Brian and Cathleen took their newborn, Emily, to meet her cousins, Erin and Savannah, in Oklahoma. The cousins were delighted with her and watched everything the adults did with Emily including changing her diapers. The girls were sitting right beside Brian the first time he changed one of Emily's messy diapers.
When he opened her diaper he said, "Ew! She pooped!"
Erin looked at him and asked, "Didn't they tell you she would do that?"
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
Mrs. Jones was reading a letter at breakfast.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
I got my stomach by doing as many crunches as I can everyday; usually either Nestle or Captain.
A man visited a psychiatrist to talk about his dreams. "Every night," the man said, "I dream that these three hideous monsters are sitting on the edge of my bed, ready to attack me."
A man goes to his doctor and says "I don't think my wife's hearing is as good as it used to be, what should I do?"
Change is inevitable except from vending machines.
When a mathematician tells you he makes a mean cup of coffee, he means average.
Mrs. Applebee, the 6th grade teacher, posed the following problem to one of her arithmetic classes:
What WAS the best thing 'before' sliced bread?
Glue stick: is that redundant or an epoxymoron? 
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter.
Sunday greetings everyone!
What if Biblical characters could be recruited as high-tech promoters?