Issue #4539
Cybersalt News
Resurrection Sunday greetings everyone: the Lord is risen!
This pandemic has reminded us how we are incapable of hanging on to even the most precious of people in our lives, let alone the very vainest of things such as sports, entertainment, success, fame, etc. If a virus from an unsanitary market in a faraway land can take it away from you, it doesn't' deserve the devotion of your live. The resurrection of Jesus reminds us that He alone is worthy of that.
When the plates in your life are all falling down, remember that Jesus love you and is calling you into His loving arms.
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
2 Sunday School Lessons
*Sunday School Lesson #1*
A Sunday School teacher challenged her children to take some time on Sunday afternoon to write a letter to God. They were to bring their letter back the following Sunday.
One little boy wrote, "Dear God, We had a good time at church today. Wish you could have been there."
*Sunday School Lesson #2*
The same Sunday school teacher was telling her class the story of the Good Samaritan, in which a man was beaten, robbed and left for dead.
She described the situation in vivid detail so her students would catch the drama.
Then she asked the class, "If you saw a person lying on the roadside all wounded and bleeding, what would you do?"
Jenny, a thoughtful little girl broke the hushed silence, "I think I'd vomit!"
Today's One Liner
One-Liner #1465
If only you'd use your powers for good instead of evil ...
Today's Clean Pun
Rocket Scientist
I cannot believe it. I just called the police to report my neighbor trying to attach a jet engine to a deer.
People will do anything to make a quick buck!
Today's Quote
Quote #1903
“Why are you looking for the Living One in a cemetery? He is not here, but raised up. Remember how he told you when you were still back in Galilee that he had to be handed over to sinners, be killed on a cross, and in three days rise up?” Then they remembered Jesus’ words.
- Luke
Today's Illustration
Unanswered Prayer, Disappointment, Faith
Dear God,
First, my car broke down
I was very late for work
But I missed that awful accident
Was that your handiwork?
I found a house I loved
But others got there first
I was angry, then relieved
When I heard the pipes had burst!
Yesterday, I found the perfect dress
But the color was too pale
Today, I found the dress in red
Would you believe, it was on sale!
I know you're watching over me
And I'm feeling truly blessed
For no matter what I pray for
You always know what's best!
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.
A man joined the priesthood. The order he joined could only speak two words at the end of every seven years.
Hormel Foods made their first batch of Spam in 1937. With everyone out shopping and hoarding food they have announced they will be making their second batch later this week ...
A friend was driving with her two children in the car. Her 7 year old son kept asking the traditional question, "How much longer?"
I recall a story my father used to tell about a pastor who had been at a church for 20 years. To show their appreciation for all his years of faithful service, the congregation decided to collect an offering and buy him a new car. So on the Sunday of his anniversary they had a special reception in honor of the pastor and his wife.
I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
I once knew a poet who would start writing his poetry immediately when he got up.
You don't need to know all of your answers in advance to solve a problem or to reach your goal. But you must have a clear idea of the problem or the goal you want to reach in advance.
I was working as a short-order cook at two restaurants in the same neighborhood. On a Saturday night, I was finishing up the dinner shift at one restaurant and hurrying to report to work at the second place, but I was delayed because one table kept sending back an order of hash browns, insisting they were cold. I replaced them several times, but still the customers were dissatisfied.
My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately, that when I pee it cleans the toilet!
I think of myself as a trophy husband: sure it was a participation trophy, but still ...
A little boy wanted $100 very badly. He prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. So, he decided to write a letter to God requesting $100.
We had built our dream house some years ago, and furnished it with quality pieces as we could afford them. Now the delivery truck carrying the last purchase, a new bedroom suite, was pulling into the driveway.
Friendly checkout clerk... thanks for keeping me that way!
I just can't get over the fact that I lost that fishing tournament! I'm still reeling.
An old Cherokee chief is teaching his grandson about life: "A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy. "It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.