Cybersalt News
Oh look, Chicken Thursday!
Wave pools are a lot of fun to swim in - unless they are used for ocean testing. You'll see what I mean when you watch "FloWave Exhibition" in the FunBlog at:
www.cybersalt.org/funblog/flowave-exhibition
Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!
~ Pastor Tim
Today's CleanLaugh
Piranha Spell
While my third-grade class was completing a writing exercise, one of the students asked me how to spell "piranha."
I told him I was unsure. To my delight, he went to the dictionary to solve his problem.
That's when I overheard another pupil say to him,
"Why bother to look it up? She doesn't know how to spell it anyway."
Today's One-liner
One-liner #1136
Choose a degree in something you love and you'll never have to work a day in your life, because that field probably isn't hiring.
Today's Clean Pun
The Science of You
You matter, unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light ...
then you energy!
Today's Quote
Quote #1584
"How we walk with the broken speaks louder than how we sit with the great."
- Bill Bennot
Today's Illustration
Sympathy
Rod and one of his fellow soldiers were assigned to wax the floors of their barracks. They'd heard that if they got the wax really hot, it would just glide across the floor, cutting their labor time in half. Unfortunately, as they were heating the can of wax with a cigarette lighter, it caught on fire, setting off alarms and attracting firetrucks, ambulances and the police.
Rod had to report to his sergeant's office immediately. Assuming he was in big trouble, he took a deep breath as he faced his superior. But before Rod could say a word, the sergeant simply muttered,
"Been there, done that.
You're free to go."
Featured Illustrations are items well suited for illustrating or inspiring a point in a sermon, speech, or devotional. Funny, moving, or perhaps even graphic, the point of them is the point you make with them.
The Cybersalt Digest is a ministry of Pastor Tim and Cybersalt.org - a member of the Cybersalt family of sites.
John and Nancy were married for 40 years and decided they wanted to renew their vows and planned a second wedding.
If my body is ever found dead on a jogging trail, just know I was murdered elsewhere and dumped there.
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
I sat there waiting for my new doctor to make his way through the file that contained my very extensive medical history.
A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor prescribed some pills, but they didn't help.
As a young child my mother told me I can be anyone I want to be ... turns out this is called identity theft.
Mountains aren't just funny. They are hill areas.
My husband, Michael, and I were at a restaurant with his boss, a rather stern older man. When Michael began a tale, which I was sure he had told before, I gave him a kick under the table. There was no response, so I gave him another poke. Still the story went on. Suddenly he stopped, grinned and said, "Oh, but I've told you this one before, haven't I?"
Jolene had wanted new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husband insisted they were an extravagance.
If we do not succeed, we run the risk of failure.
Jasons aren't made: they are Bourne.
Strangely enough, this is all true. 
When I lived in a dorm, one of the favorite intramural sports was water fights. Dousing and bombarding one another with water from squirt guns, glasses, balloons, even wastebaskets. Since each room had a sink, there was endless ammunition. The most frequent target was the Resident Assistant.
I'm still not sure if I understand ambiguity.
You’re at a loss for words: don’t worry, maybe it’s just aphasia.
One October, my wife and I spent a vacation on Washington's Olympic Peninsula. We were eager to visit the rain forests near the coast, but we heard that snow slides had made some of the roads impassable. Although apprehensive about the conditions we might run into, we drove on.